


To Live a Better Life

by Rachel_Lu



Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Office, Debt, F/M, Secretaries, based on a kdrama, families, you'll see - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-01-20
Updated: 2019-08-19
Packaged: 2019-10-13 10:26:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 18
Words: 37,674
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17486426
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rachel_Lu/pseuds/Rachel_Lu
Summary: Rose Tyler has been the secretary to the CEO of Gallifrey Inc. for nine years, and she's ready to move on with her life. But when Mr. Smith proposes something less than practical in lieu of her resignation, what will she say?





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hi! i'm not dead!!!! i hope there are still people here to read this lol
> 
> This story is based on the kdrama "What's Wrong with Secretary Kim?" Which I HIGHLY recommend. I'm taking liberties with it because the female lead is not nearly as headstrong as Rose Tyler, but y'all seem to prefer my AUs and honestly so do I.
> 
> Enjoy!

In short, she could say that working for him was exhausting.

Rose Tyler had been John Smith’s secretary for ages, nine years, and it never got any easier.  Oh, she understood her duties, and was quite good at them, but it ate up most of her time. Even when she wasn’t in the office, she was on call, so she never got to go out and drink or enjoy herself.  

And now, after nine years of working for the CEO of Gallifrey Inc., she was turning in her resignation.  It was a decision that she’d pondered over for hours upon hours, and discussed with her mum, who very much wanted her to quit.  Her poor mum hadn’t seen very much of her in the past years, and Rose felt plenty of guilt for that. Now, though, she was making a change and taking her life back.

It might have been a bad time to do it, but in his personal driver’s car on the way to take him home from an event, she knew she had to tell him.  They’d had a good night, except for the fact that Rose had to cover Mr. Smith’s tracks every time he forgot about a woman he’d promised something to.  He was one of the most eligible bachelors in the world, and women were constantly asking for something from him. And those things,  _ she  _ was usually the one getting.

“Mr. Smith?” She looked over at him, breaking the silence that had settled over the car.  “I have something I need to tell-”

“I was amazing tonight, wasn’t I?” he interrupted her, straightening his tie.  He offered her a charming smile and she forced a tight lipped one back in return.  She didn’t exactly want to make him think that she was pleased with him. She also didn’t want him to think she was upset with him, so it was a very, very fine line that she had to walk. 

“They loved me,” he continued.  “Sometimes I think they forget I can speak nineteen languages;  I can communicate with the masses so effectively. That’s why most other companies want to work with ”

“You did a lovely job, Mr. Smith.  You always do,” she offered, smiling.  “But I really have something to tell you.  It’s important.”

When he looked over at her, it was with amusement in his eyes.  “What is it, Miss Tyler?” He looked as though he was expecting her to say something trivial, and she knew this was going to be a slap in the face to him.  

She swallowed hard, keeping her smile plastered onto her face and her eyes bright.  “I’m turning in my resignation tomorrow, Mr. Smith.”

The smile didn’t leave his face, but his eyes looked very different.  “Miss Tyler,” he scoffed, shaking his head, “I have to have misheard you.”

“I’m afraid not, Mr. Smith.  Of course, I’ll stay and help you find a replacement for me, it would be rude not to, but I’m not staying once the new secretary is trained.”

Mr. Smith looked ahead, through the front of the car.  He wasn't driving, of course, never drove himself places, mostly so he could focus on himself.  He did a lot of focusing on himself, actually. And if he wasn’t being driven by his driver, Rose was the one that had to do it.  He watched the lights go by for a few moments, his jaw set. 

Her heart pounded against her ribs as she waited for his response.  There was only so much silence she could take from this man, and she really didn’t want to hurt his feelings.  Finally, he turned back to her and spoke. 

“I’m sorry, Miss Tyler, but I can’t accept your resignation.  You must know you are far too valuable to let go.”

“You aren’t letting me go, I’m  _ quitting,”  _ Rose said firmly, her smile finally slipping.  “I’m sorry, Mr. Smith, but I’m not trying to have a discussion with you, I’m telling you that I’m leaving.  I can provide any assistance in finding a new-”

“Why?” he turned back to her suddenly, staring at her as though he couldn’t quite believe it.  “Why would you want to quit?”

Rose swallowed.  He was looking at her too deeply, and it made her a little disconcerted.  “Well, Mr. Smith, I’m not even sure if that’s something I have to discuss with you.  That’s my personal decision.”

“Miss Tyler, we’ve known each other for nine years.  I think it might be in your best interest to say  _ something  _ to me.”

“Thank you for the opportunity,” Rose said carefully.

“That’s not a reason.”

Rose blew out her cheeks. “Mr. Smith, we can talk about it later.  When I’m leaving for good. I just thought it would be best to let you know so that you could find someone new soon.”

“I don’t want anyone new.”

“I’m sorry, but you’ll have to get someone new.  Mr. Smith, did you think I’d stay at this job forever?”

“Why not?” Mr. Smith asked, adjusting his tie again. “I’ve done most everything for you, given you a perfect opportunity.  What reason could you have for leaving?”

Rose had a feeling he’d be like this.  He wasn’t exactly gentle when it came to matters of confrontation, but she supposed that was part of his job as CEO.  It didn’t allow for him to have many friends outside of work, and she’d never seen him have a girlfriend. It was almost sad, in a way. 

They parted ways when Rose was dropped off at her car back at the office building.  Mr. Smith still refused to look at her, and although Rose didn’t want to upset him, she couldn’t act like she wanted to make him happy.  This was about her life, not his. And she had to keep reminding herself that she didn’t owe him an explanation. 

“Goodbye, Mr. Smith, I’ll see you in the morning.”  She left the car, feeling his eyes on her back. She was putting him in a tough spot, she realized, but she didn’t need to stay and help him find a new secretary like she was.  He should be  _ thanking  _ her.  She was with him for nine years, didn’t she deserve to have a life of her own?

Huffing, she walked to her car and drove home, still stewing with Mr. Smith’s negative reaction.  It was all so stupid, but she couldn’t help but boil until she got home. She parked in her spot and headed up the stairs to her apartment, sighing with relief once she was inside.  She’d deal with it all in the morning. 

She was in her pajamas and already in bed when there was a knock at her door.  She pinched the bridge of her nose and sat up. “Who is it?” She called.

“It’s me.”

“Mr. Smith?”

“Yes.”

Grumbling, Rose threw her covers off and walked to the door, feeling her rage notch up again.  She flung the door open. “Mr. Smith, we have  _ work  _ in the morning.  What are you doing here?”

“I have to know why you’re quitting.”

She should have expected this. He’d just think her answer was stupid, she knew it, and she crossed her arms, tilting her chin down.  “Mr. Smith, with all due respect, it’s really none of your business.”

To her surprise, he looked hurt by her comment. His brows drew together slightly and his eyes, intense and glinting in the street lights, regarded her with a focus that she’d only seen a handful of times.

“You and I have known each other for nine years, Miss Tyler, I thought you might be comfortable enough around me to tell me.”  He leaned against the half-wall that was outside her door and created a very tiny porch. “And I won’t leave until you tell me.”

Rose ran her hand through her hair.  “Alright then, fine. I’ve been working for you for nine years, I’ve never gotten a day off, and I’d like to figure out what I actually want to do with my life.”

“You don’t like this job?”

“Mr. Smith, I love my job, but I want a  _ career.   _ I want to go to school, maybe.  I should have some freedom to decide that.  And besides all that, I’m not exactly getting any younger and I’d… I’d like to get married at some point.  Family is really important to me.”

He blinked.  “I… I didn’t know that you were interested in marriage, Miss Tyler.”

“You wouldn't have, I suppose. I never told you.  I was honestly never going to. But it’s still important to me, and I have a life to live outside of you.”  She winced a little at her own words. “I need to live my own life, I mean.”

Rose was surprised to see Mr. Smith look hurt by that.  There were few times she’d seen anything faze him, and this wasn’t something she thought would get to him. After all, she was just a secretary, and that was an incredibly replaceable position.  Feeling suddenly guilty, she blew out her cheeks and ran a hand through her hair.

“I’m sorry, I don’t mean to snap at you,” she said, “But you’ve just  _ turned up  _ outside my house, making me tell you why I want to quit, after I’m technically done for the day.  I’m a little shaken up.”

“Can I come inside?” He said suddenly.

“What?”

“Can I come inside?”

“No, I’m going to bed.  I’ll see you in the morning, Mr. Smith.”

“Wait, I have an idea!  One that will get us both what we want and one I think will be quite convenient.  You’ll have to let me suggest it to you before you continue to get upset. I have a  _ very  _ brilliant brain, as you well know, so I think you’ll like it.”

At the very least, Rose was interested in what he had to say.  She crossed her arms and leaned her hip against the door frame. “Alright, Mr. Smith, what is it that is so beneficial to the two of us?  What is this brilliant idea of yours?” She was growing fed up. Not that he could say anything that would shock her at this point.

“You stay my secretary, and I will marry you.”

Well, she was wrong.  Apparently there was  _ one thing  _ he could say that would shock her.  He held his arms out with a shit-eating grin on his face, as though he’d said the most brilliant thing in the world.  Rose held back the urge to roll her eyes, not wanting to actually get in trouble with him since he was still her boss.  

He was only suggesting it for personal gain.

“You can’t be serious, Mr. Smith.”

“And why not?  You’ll get to be married, which is what you want, and I’ll get to keep you as my secretary.  We both benefit immensely from such an arrangement.”

Rose shook her head. “You don’t get it.  I’ll see you tomorrow, Mr. Smith. I can’t deal with this anymore tonight.  I will bring my resignation letter tomorrow and will help you with the selection process for a new secretary.”  She turned back into her flat and shut the door before he could say any other stupid things. 

She locked the door, shaking her head.  He was a bit stupid, she thought. Of course she was a bit attracted to him, he was powerful and handsome, but he was also so  _ arrogant.  _ He’d been that way when she started working for him and it hadn’t changed even a little bit; she’d just grown more used to it and better acclimated to his strange habits.  But saying he would  _ marry  _ her?  That was just about the dumbest thing she’d heard the whole time she’d known him.   And nine years was plenty of time for him to say stupid things.

She pulled a bottle of wine from the top of her fridge, pouring a glass angrily.  She’d come in late tomorrow. That would show him.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Can I just say how happy and filled with warm fuzzies i was to see all the reads and comments on this? Thank you so, so much for reading the first chapter of this. I hope you all continue to read and comment, it inspires and motivates me so much!!!!
> 
> Also to those who reblogged on tumblr with sweet tags, I never know how to reply, but thank you from the bottom of my very exhausted, college student heart<3

Rose woke up, wishing she had actually been drunk.  Unfortunately, her good work ethic made her feel far too guilty to actually drink until she got drunk.  She blew out her cheeks and rolled out of bed, remembering the night before and Mr. Smith’s idiotic request.  How could he suggest they get married? They’d known each other for years, yes, but there had never been anything  _ there.   _ Had there?

She grumbled to herself, beginning to get ready for the day.  He was confusing her for no reason, making her think that he might like her, when she knew that it was simply because he wanted to keep her on as a secretary.  She shook herself and finished applying her makeup and tying her hair up in a professional style. 

When she reached the office, everybody was staring at her.  She walked past the cluster of desks where the others at Gallifrey Inc. worked and looked between them and the path to her own desk, outside of Mr. Smith’s office.  

“Are you all alright?” Rose asked them, leaning against the doorway to their office space.

“We just heard something went on between you and Mr. Smith last night.  He was pretty upset when he came in this morning.” Martha, one of the marketing team, said.  “We were kinda wondering if you had a fight.”

“Ah, well, I guess you all should know that I’m turning in my resignation today.  I think it’s time I moved on a little bit from the company.”

“You’ve been at Mr. Smith’s absolute beck and call for the past nine years,” Donna Noble said, crossing her arms over her chest.  “I think it’s about time that you went off and did something else. Congratulations.”

Rose nodded to them and the others, smiling. “Thanks.  I’d better get to him now though, I’m still his secretary for now.”  She walked to her desk, then, before anyone could say anything else about her resignation.  She wasn’t sure she wanted to talk about it. She set her briefcase down and pulled out the resignation letter she’d written up.  Well, it was now or never. If she didn’t give it to him now he’d never believe that she was actually quitting.

With a deep breathe, she knocked on his office door, which was a heavy, wooden thing, that opened into a huge office that had a sitting space off to one side. She heard the call from him to come in and she pushed the door open, smiling pleasantly.

“Ah, Miss Tyler!  A pleasure to see you, as usual,” he said.  “As I’m  _ sure  _ it is your pleasure to see me.”

Rose blinked.  This was exactly how she began most conversations with him.  “Well, Mr. Smith, good morning to you.” She walked to his desk and extended the paper to him.  “Here’s my resignation letter, as I said I’d be giving to you yesterday.”

His smile fell. “What?”

“We spoke about this.”  She said, not letting her smile slip.

“Well, yes, but I thought you’d at least consider my proposal, quite literally.  You won’t find a more eligible bachelor than me, I can assure you of that.” He adjusted his tie and looked proudly up at her.  “I’m sure what you actually mean is you’ve come here to accept.”

“No,” Rose said firmly, setting the letter down on his desk with finality.  “As I said last night, I will help you find another secretary, but I won’t be staying once he or she is trained.  Now, you have a lunch appointment with Mr. Rasilon at twelve and a board meeting at three. Should you need me before then, I’ll be at my desk.”

She nodded to him and started to leave, hearing him set down his pen as her back turned on him  She thought he might call out to her, but to her surprise, he didn’t. Blowing out a sigh of relief, she exited Mr. Smith’s office and let the door snick shut behind her.  Brushing off the anxiety that having a chat with him had brought up, she sat back at her desk and looked to all the files she had to go through before leaving. There were plenty of things that she’d already sorted once she’d gotten them, since she’d really wanted to be the most organized and professional secretary she could be.  She had to thank her past self for her practices. She went to taking Mr. Smith’s phone calls and fell into her work day without another thought.

What felt like hours later, Martha slid into the extra chair Rose had next to her desk and put her phone in front of her face.  Rose blinked in surprise and saw that it was a picture of a young business man. She looked between Martha’s expectant face and the photo.

“Who’s this?” Rose asked patiently.

“His name’s Adam, he’s a business associate to Master Enterprises.  And he’s willing to go on a blind date.” She raised her eyebrows for emphasis.

Rose rolled her eyes.  “Oh, Martha, come on, now, I can’t be dating.  I  _ don’t  _ date, I don’t have time!”

“But you will now!” Martha protested. “You know, since you won’t have to deal with his royal highness in there anymore.  Come on, you should consider it at least. For me?” Martha shook her phone a little bit and Rose blew out her cheeks, studying the photo.

She wrinkled her nose.  “Well, I guess he’s cute,” she admitted. “But I don’t know if I’d want to date him, do we have anything in common?”

“That’s what the date is for!” Martha exclaimed.  “To see if you’re compatible. And it would only be blind to him, so you wouldn’t have to be nervous about that part.  Just promise me you’ll think about it? Tell me at lunch?”

Rose had to admit that the idea of actually going on a date was very appealing.  “Alright,” She said slowly, “I’ll let you know at lunch. I’ve got to think about this.”

Martha left just as Mr. Smith left his office and strode up to her desk, shaking Rose from even being able to begin thinking about the blind date.  He had his hands in his pockets and was looking down at her, his brows drawn together. 

“What time did you say my lunch appointment was?” He asked, looking frazzled.

Rose cocked her head to the side.  “Twelve. Are you alright?”

“Yes,  _ fine,  _ just fine, I’m-”

“Your tie is all crooked.”

His hands fluttered by his neck for a minute before dropping.  Rose, however, couldn’t take it and got to her feet, going around the desk to fix his tie herself. She’d done it for him most mornings, and wasn’t sure who had done it today.  Probably him, since it was done so poorly.

She felt his breath catch as she adjusted his tie and wondered if she’d made a mistake. She’d done this  _ so many times,  _ but he’d never proposed to her before.  Was he thinking about it too? What was he thinking about?  Her heart started beating a little faster and she cursed herself internally, finishing up with his tie and smoothing her hand down it.

“There.”

“You’ll have to do it from now on, as you have been,” Mr. Smith said once she stepped back from him.

Rose smiled pleasantly and nodded, clasping her hands together in front of her body.  “Okay,” she said. “If that’s what you want, I’m sorry that I didn’t do it this morning.”

“Yes,” Mr. Smith nodded.  “I think it’s better that you continue on with your duties until you…” He stopped, but she knew what he was going to say.

Rose took a deep breath, gathering up the courage to ask her next question.  “Mr. Smith, would it be alright if I put up notifications for the job opening in the company?”

“What job opening?”

She dropped her posture. “Mr. Smith.”

He frowned. “Fine.  I guess you really are serious about this. Go on, then, list it.  I’ll see whoever you want me to see.” He turned and walked back into his office, brushing a hand over his tie one last time. Rose sighed and turned back to her desk to make the listing.  His guilt tripping wasn’t going to make her stay. It wasn’t. She wouldn’t let him do that to her.

She remembered all the time she’d spent here, the times he’d guilted her into learning a new language, going somewhere she didn’t want to go, the list just went on and on.  He made her pick him up when he’d been drinking, and he was a pleasant drunk, but she was a sour designated driver. She’d be free of Mr. John Smith soon enough.

*******************

“Have you thought about it?”  Martha asked the second Rose sat down next to her for lunch.

She hadn’t, but she had to say something.  Anything. And honestly, what harm would it do to go on a blind date with what looked to be a very handsome man?  She nodded. “Alright, I’ll go.”

“Oh, good, cause I already texted him and he wants to meet up tonight.”  Martha grinned. “At the little cafe on Northeast. Sound fun?”

Rose had to laugh.  “Sure, Martha. That sounds great.”

The others from the office sat around the table as well, chattering about their own days and Rose realized that she was going to miss this. She was going to miss the bustle off the office, the cheerful camaraderie that surrounded their department.  She’d developed such a bond with these people, and she hoped it wouldn’t slip away from her when she left. 

          ******************

That night, she stood outside Cafe 5, a name she never understood for a cafe that had very excellent food and coffee.  She had the advantage of knowing who she was looking for, but she had to pretend like she wasn’t. 

The man from Martha’s picture walked up to her, a beaming smile on his face.  “Are you Rose?” 

“Yeah, I am.  You must be Adam.”  
Adam shook her hand, rather aggressively, and nodded.  “Yeah, Adam Mitchell, that’s me. Martha’s told me a lot about you.”

“Oh, she has?”  Rose laughed. “Well, let’s go inside and we can talk all about that.”

As it turned out, there was one topic that Adam liked a lot, and that was himself.  He was very successful and wanted her to know it, cluing her in on the awards his office had won and how many of them had been on his behalf.  

Rose knew she was thinking too far ahead, but she couldn’t see herself dating or marrying someone like this. He barely let her get in a word.  As soon as it was polite, she said that she had to get going and apologized if she was inconveniencing him.

“Not at all, I have a busy day tomorrow anyway.  But the coffee and conversation was lovely.” He smiled at her and she politely returned it.

Her eyes zoned in on his tie, which had somehow become crooked.  “Oh, your tie-” On an instinct, she moved to fix it.

“Miss Tyler!” She heard a very familiar, bellowing voice call out to her.  She felt her eyes widen and she let go of Adam’s tie, knowing that if she didn't’ she’d probably accidentally choke him out.  Mr. Smith was striding towards them, his eyes alight with fury.

“What are you doing out here? I called you twice.”  He seemed to not be able to see Adam at all, his eyes locked onto hers.

Rose looked down at her phone.  “I’m sorry, Mr. Smith, is it really that urgent?”

“I should go,” Adam interjected.  “Rose, I’ll call you.”

Rose nodded politely and smiled.  “Alright. Enjoy the rest of your night, Adam.”  She took her time during back to Mr. Smith. “And what can I do for  _ you?” _

“What was that?”

“I don’t have to explain anyth-”  
“Why were you fixing his tie?”

Rose blinked.  He was upset over her… Fixing Adam’s tie?  “It’s a work habit, Mr. Smith. Why did you call?”

“A work habit?  You, touching that man’s neck, is a work habit?”

“Why are you so upset?  You don’t have any claim over what I do, especially not now.”  
She wasn’t sure where the snap had come from, but it seemed to upset him. His cheek twitched and he turned away from her.  “I’ve brought my car. I’ve been invited to a wine night at the Prime Minister’s and I need you to accompany me.”

Rose knew perfectly well that the Prime MInister and Mr. Smith were friends, and he really didn’t need her to go with him.  He was using it as an excuse. For what, she wasn’t sure, but she was  _ definitely  _ annoyed and needed to bite her tongue, lest she say anything else that was on the edge of whatever line she was walking at the moment.

“Fine,” She spit out.  “I don’t see why you need me, but I will accompany you to Downing Street.  Are any other secretaries going tonight?”

“No.  Just you.”

Rose balled her hands up in fists at her sides.  He had to be kidding, absolutely kidding. He truly was the strangest man she’d ever known.


	3. Chapter 3

The ‘wine night’ that Mr. Smith made Rose go to was clearly a ruse, and clearly something he’d invited himself to, but she was beyond caring anymore.  Once it was appropriate, she left, calling a taxi to take her back to her own car. 

“Where are you going?” Mr. Smith asked her, as though she hadn’t already told him where she’d be going.

“I need to go home, Mr. Smith.  We have interviews to conduct tomorrow.”

Mr. Smith blinked at her and frowned a little. “Are you sure?”

“Absolutely positive, actually.  I’ve gotten notifications that people are interested already.”  She showed him the screen of her phone. “I’ve scheduled appointments with them tomorrow morning and afternoon.  Don’t worry, nothing interferes with your previous schedule.”

Mr. Smith clenched his jaw, a dimple sticking out as he did so.  “Fine. I will see you tomorrow then, Miss Tyler.”

She dipped her head in return, smiling pleasantly.  “Thank you, Mr. Smith.” She bid her goodbye to the Prime Minister, who knew Rose very well by now, and left Downing Street.  It should’ve been exciting, but Rose was so  _ tired,  _ and she was sick of dealing with Mr. Smith, at least for today.  She was a bit surprised that he’d let her leave, and hadn’t begged her to stay.  Maybe he actually  _ was  _ trying to get her to stay.

And that night, the nightmares returned.

Tied up, and sat next to a little boy who gave her candy to stop crying.  A long day, sitting on the floor with a woman who called herself their mother, even though she didn’t  _ know  _ that woman, and didn’t know the boy either. 

“ _ Come with me.  COME WITH ME!” _

*******  
The next morning, she gave Mr. Smith the list of applicants, and was not surprised in the least when he glared up at her, looking incredibly miserable.

“We meet with these four today,” Rose said, pointing to the top of her list.  “And we meet with the rest tomorrow if there aren’t any today that you like.”  
“I don’t really wish to see any of them.’  
“Well, I could see them alone, but I think you’ll want to see who your new secretary might be,” she said, growing a little frustrated with the temper tantrums that he was throwing.  She dropped her arms, still holding the paper lightly in her hands. “ _Please,_ Mr. Smith.”

She was surprised to see him nod, and his eyes soften ever so slightly.  He laced his fingers together and set his hands on the desk. “Fine,” He said, “But I’m not promising anything.”

“I didn’t think you would,” she admitted.  “The first applicant is to meet us in the conference room in thirty minutes.”

“Alright,” he said, looking away from her and back to his computer.  She sighed, happy to have gotten this much out of him, and left his office.  Hopefully he’d like one of the secretary applicants, at least enough to try to replace her.  She still wanted him to have a relatively easy time when it came to secretarial duties. She knew she was very good at her job and she would be difficult to replace, but she couldn’t let him know that.  It would only make him try to convince her further.

At least he’d stopped trying to get her to marry him.  

**********

A half hour later she was sat next to a very stiff Mr. Smith, and a smiling young woman sat across from them.  Rose tried to be extra kind to her since she knew that Mr. Smith most likely wouldn’t be. 

“Alright, Miss Perth, I’d like to look over your resume if that’s alright with you,” she said, smiling cheerfully to the young woman.

“You’ve got a string on your shirt,” Mr. Smith said curtly before she could even reply.  “You’ve a  _ loose string.  _ Now tell me, how are you supposed to make sure I look presentable if you can barely handle yourself?”

Miss Perth opened and closed her mouth, surprised by his tone.  “Well, I’d make sure that it would never happen again, Mr. Smith,” she said demurely.  “Really, I would.”

“Nevermind. I need someone up to Miss Tyler’s expertise.  You can go.” 

Miss Perth nodded and headed for the door, and with a dirty look at her boss, Rose followed her.

“I’m really sorry,” Rose said once the door had shut behind them. “I don’t know why he’s being like this.”

“It’s alright, Miss Tyler, it’s not your fault,” Miss Perth smiled and patted her arm.  “He’s clearly very attached to you.”

Rose blinked. “I’ve been his secretary for nine years, I suppose he has a right to get a bit attached to my work-”

Miss Perth wrinkled her nose and smiled. “That’s not what I meant.  Anyway, thank you for the experience. I’d better be going.”

A little stunned by the woman’s words, Rose went back into the conference room, where Mr. Smith was looking up at her expectantly. It was then that she remembered that she was mad at him and was going to continue to be so. She turned her nose up at him and sat down next to him again, busying herself with the next file.

“Are you upset?” He asked.  “You would’ve been alright with that slob working for me?”

“She was not a slob,” Rose said, not making eye contact with him. “And I think you would’ve found that she’s a very nice woman, and one string on a shirt doesn’t mean anything when it comes to cleanliness.  I’ve picked them off of you from time to time when you haven’t noticed them.”  
He pointed at her. “Ah-ha, that’s my point!  I shouldn’t have to notice, that should be the secretary’s job.”  
“It actually shouldn’t.”  Rose set the next file down in front of him. “I actually go above and beyond my job description, and it’s not fair of you to expect that next secretary to do the same, especially if she’s as young as I was when I started here.  Times have changed, you know, jobs are different. And besides, I just wanted-”

“What?” He asked curiously, leaning his elbows on the table and angling his head to look up into her face. “What did you want?”

“I just wanted to impress you, and I suppose that’s something that’s stuck.  But that might not be the case for the next secretary you have. You should just be aware of that.”  She clenched her jaw and tapped the file. “Pay attention. This next girl has plenty of experience and I think you might like her.”

He slouched back in his seat, pouting. “I’d rather you stayed,” he mumbled.

Rose blew out her cheeks. He always made her feel guilty when he said things like that.  It was cute, in a way, though she’d never tell him or he’d just do it more. She shook her head and sat up a little straighter, as though to compensate for his poor posture.

“Well, with all due respect, Mr. Smith, you should get used to that not being the case. I won’t be here much longer.”

He didn’t reply and went through many of the other applicants the same way, finding one thing he didn’t like about their attire or their voice or  _ whatever  _ was out of place, and deciding that he didn’t want them.  Rose was very close to throttling him by the time the last applicant of the day came in.

She didn’t have much experience, she was  _ very  _ young, and her hair was done up in two buns that looked as though they just  _ barely  _ fit into the office setting. Rose couldn’t help but smile when she saw her.

“Lynda Moss, lovely to meet you,” Rose said, setting her file down and looking over to Mr. Smith, who had completely checked out.  She forced a smile and looked back to Lynda.

“It’s really nice to meet you too,” Lynda said enthusiastically. “I really think I can do great things for this company as Mr. Smith’s secretary, if I’m just given the chance to do so.” She beamed and Rose nodded.

“I see you don’t have much experience. What made you want to apply here?”

“Well, Gallifrey is a great company, and quite honestly, the pay was good, and I’m struggling.”

Rose’s heart went out to the girl immediately.  She looked over to Mr. Smith. “And what do you think, sir?”

“Hm.”

“About Lynda. What do you think?”

“You’re very young, Lynda.”  
“Yes, I am,” Lynda said, looking a little embarrassed. “But if I don’t start now, when will I?”

Mr. Smith’s mouth set into a thin line. It was clear that he didn’t like the idea, but it was also clear that he knew Rose’s opinion would override him.  He looked over into her hopeful eyes and rolled his own.

“We’ll call you, Miss Moss.  Thank you for your time.”  
Lynda shook hands with both of them, thanking them over and over, before disappearing from the room with a skip in her step.

“I like her,” Rose said before Mr. Smith could say anything negative. “I think she’s the best applicant we’ve had and I think you should choose her. I can train her well and be ready within the month, seeing as she’s so willing to work and do a good job.  She might even turn out better than me.”

Mr. Smith shot her a dirty look. “No one is better than you.”

Rose gritted her teeth in response, not glorifying his comment with any words.  She put Lynda’s file at the top of the small stack she had. “I’ll leave her file on your desk for you to look at today.  We should answer her by tomorrow at least.”

“You’re really going to make me choose one of them.”

“Yes, of course I am,” She looked over at him, puzzled.

“I suppose I just keep forgetting that you’re serious about all this.  My offer still stands, you know. I really can’t afford to lose you.”

“And with all due respect, Mr. Smith, I can’t afford to stay.”  She turned her chair towards him slightly. “I told you my reasons when you asked. I hope you can be respectful of those reasons, and I hope that you can trust my intuition with Lynda.  I think she can be a great secretary to you.”

“She won’t be fixing my ties,” he said, waggling a finger at her.

Rose shook herself.  “If that’s what you want, no, she won’t help you with that, though I don’t see why-”

“I just don’t want her to,” Mr. Smith said, looking away from Rose, suddenly interested in Lynda’s file.  “And besides, you’ll still be doing all your regular duties until you leave.”

“And I suppose that includes fixing your tie?”

“It does.”  
Rose had to fight back the urge to roll her eyes at him.  She wasn’t sure why this whole idea of someone fixing his tie or not fixing his tie was so important to him, but if he was going to continue to complain about it, she’d just do as he asked.

“Yes, Mr. Smith, if that’s what you want.  Will you give Lynda my job, then?”  
He slammed the file shut.  “I’ll give her _the_ job, Miss Tyler, since that’s what you want and I trust your judgement more than anyone else’s on this blasted planet.  But I’m not giving her _your_ job.  Your job is already filled and will continue to be filled after you leave.”  
He picked up his things and began to head for the exit of the room, leaving Rose absolutely gobsmacked in her chair. He turned around to look at her and jerked his head towards the door.

“Are you coming?”

“Yes, sir,” Rose replied, scrambling to her feet with the rest of the files that she needed to discard.

“You look tired. Did you sleep last night?”  
“I’m fine, sir, don’t worry about me.’  
“Well, I don’t want you to get sick.”

“I won’t get sick, Mr. Smith.  You shouldn’t worry about me. I promise, I’m fine.”  She said the last firmly, ending the conversation then and there.

He blinked at her and then seemed to accept her answer before barrelling straight on.  “What are your lunch plans for today? Actually, never mind, cancel them regardless. I want you to join me for lunch today, and we can discuss what you mean to do to train Lynda.  And what you intend to do after you leave.”

He strode out the door, and Rose, realizing she wasn’t going to win this particular argument, followed close behind.   

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Rose's nightmares WILL be explained, this is where it ties in heavily with the kdrama. If you've seen it you know how that goes:)
> 
> Thank you for reading!


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OKAY I should specify again that I am SEVERELY straying from the kdrama. The main plot points, story, and some scenarios are the same, but i don't enjoy writing word for word AUs, so I just decided to take my parts and run with it but incorporate my favorite scenes and follow the same plot and form as the kdrama. I hope that's okay!
> 
> Enjoy!

 

Lunch was painful, to put it simply.  Rose had a hard time dealing with Mr. Smith in the office, but out of the office, and when he didn’t want to talk about work, things were nearly impossible.  He kept asking her  _ questions,  _ weird questions about her favorite places to go and favorite things to eat.  Her head spun with his questions, and his hand kept twitching as though he wanted to write it down.  She had to stop herself from frowning at him several times.

“Why are you asking me all of this?”

“Nevermind that.  It’s not important.”

Rose pursed her lips and looked down at her plate.  “Right,” she said tightly. “Don’t tell me. But didn’t you want to talk about Lynda’s employment?”

He blinked at her. “Ah. Yes.  That. Well, you have to know that I trust your judgement very much, Miss Tyler. Also, I’ve seen how neat you keep all your files from your years of working here, so I’m sure you’ll be just fine in training her.”

“So wha- what was the point of this lunch?” Rose asked, “If it’s not a business lunch?”

“Don’t you worry about it.  How’s your food?”

He continued to ask her questions until they went back to the office, and by that time she was so sick of him that she told him only to buzz her if he  _ absolutely needed her. _

“I have some things I need to catch up on,” She told him, smiling pleasantly.

He seemed to accept this and she sank into her chair, settling in for a long day of  _ whatever  _ this was.

When Rose left the office, she went straight back to her flat to make herself dinner.  After kicking off her shoes and settling in, she heard her phone ring. No.  _ No.  _  He was not doing this to her.  Looking down at the screen, she saw his name on it and balled up her fists. 

“Yes, Mr. Smith?”  She said through gritted teeth.

“Come outside.”

“What?”

“Come out- is there something wrong with your ears?”  
“No, there isn’t.  What do you need?”

He huffed out a frustrated breath.  “Just come outside and you’ll see.”

Rose hung up on him, angrily shoving her feet into her sneakers and throwing a cardigan on over her outfit from the day, which she hadn’t even had the chance to take off yet.  She left her flat and stood on the balcony, staring down at him. He was standing outside his car and smiling up at her. He had a nice smile, she had to admit to herself. 

“What did you need from me, Mr. Smith?” She asked.

“Have you ever been on a yacht?”

Rose blinked. “N-o… Why?”

“Well, see, I have my yacht for the night but I have no one to go with, so I was wondering if you would tag along.  Dinner included, of course.” 

Rose wanted to say no.  But she  _ had  _ sort of wanted to go on Mr. Smith’s yacht ever since she’d found out he had one.  And it was decently warm out. She couldn’t really justify saying no. So she nodded.

“If that’s what you want, Mr. Smith,” She said patiently.  “Give me a minute to lock up my flat and I’ll be down.”

He seemed pleased by that answer and nodded to her, leaning back against his car.  She went back into the flat to lock up, wondering if she should be angry or not. At the very least, she would be getting a free dinner, a  _ nice  _ dinner, in comparison to whatever she would’ve been having at home.  Something canned, she mused to herself. 

After making sure her flat was secured, she went down and got into the car, barely sparing a glance to Mr. Smith.  The second they were in the car though, she had her questions and she needed them to be answered.

“Mr. Smith, you’ve got to tell me why you’ve invited me to your yacht.  Out of nowhere.’  
He glanced over at her as he started the engine. “Well, I wanted to go, but it’s not recommended that I go alone when I want to go on trips like this.  I’m very valuable, you know.”

“Yes, Mr. Smith.  But don’t you have a crew?”

“I do have a Captain, who was not happy that I called him so late, mind you, but I pay him enough that he wasn’t too concerned about it,” he raised an eyebrow at her. “Why are you asking me so many questions?”

Rose blushed, much to her own surprise, and looked away from him.  “Because it’s odd, Mr. Smith, and I think it’s odd that  _ you  _ don’t find it odd.”

“Well, I think you also deserve to have a bit of fun before you… Leave.” He seemed tos pit the last word out, like he didn’t want to say it at all.  “Figured this might be a nice… Start.”

Rose wanted to tell him that it was far too late to facilitate any sort of friendship between the two of them. Their relationship was strictly professional, after all, and it always had been.  But all of a sudden, he wanted to take her onto his yacht, and though his mentions of marrying her had stopped, she didn’t particularly feel like she was safe from him saying more of the same. 

Instead, she just nodded. “If that’s what you want, Mr, Smith.”  
“It is, thanks.”

The drive to the pier was quiet, because when they weren’t talking about work, they didn’t talk at all.  There wasn’t a particular reason for it, in fact, Rose had the suspicion that they had more in common than he would ever let on, but he didn’t like to talk about his personal life, and so Rose never talked about hers.  Sometimes he would ask, though, little, hinting questions that she should tell him more about herself.

But what was the point if you still didn’t know anything about the other person?

Rose pulled her sweater tighter around her when they got out of the car and headed towards the dock. She could tell right away which boat was his.  The most lit up: strung with white lights on the sides and up around to the top of it. She squinted a little. That didn’t look like the typical set up for a parked yacht, but then again, she didn’t really know enough about yachts to say anything about it.

“Isn’t is lovely?” He asked, completely enthused.  He gestured his hand out to the boat. “I call it  _ The Tardis.” _

“Oh, interesting,” she said politely.

He kept on beaming. “It’s clever, I know.”

He preceded her onto the boat, which was par to the course of how they walked together, and Rose began to wish desperately that she’d said no to coming along with him. It was already awkward, and it probably was best that they didn’t see each other outside of work. He’d already  _ crashed a date  _ for her, and she couldn’t say that she knew where any of it was coming from.  She blew out a sigh and forced a professional smile on her face trying desperately trying to make things feel normal, at least to her.  She  _ needed  _ normal until she left.

“We’ll have dinner on the deck,” he announced, and she noticed a table with two chairs sat on the deck, right near the edge of the boat.  “Once we set sail.”

Her mind raced. Wasn’t this supposed to be more casual?  Like something simple and  _ friendly?   _ This looked suspiciously romantic.

She turned to look at him to read his face and saw that he was already looking at her.  She caught an odd softness in his gaze but it was gone after she blinked. It shook her enough that she couldn’t think of anything to say to him.  She swallowed. “Okay,” she said lamely. She was still painfully confused, but he didn’t look like he was going to reveal anything else.

Mr. Smith told the captain they were all ready to go, and Rose felt the boat lurch under her feet. She stumbled a bit and ended up grabbing onto his arms and looking up into his stoic face. She pulled back immediately.

“Sorry, sir,” she forced out, wishing for the millionth time that she’d said no to this whole thing.  

“It’s quite alright.  Would you have a seat?”

They sat down and the captain brought dinner out to them, which consisted of well cooked steaks and mashed potatoes.  Rose couldn’t really remember the last time she’d had a steak; it had to have been a couple years at least.

But talking to Mr. Smith wasn’t something that she was necessarily accustomed to.  “Mr. Smith, do you want to discuss your plans for tomorrow?”

“I’d rather not talk work if that’s alright with you,” he said, making it clear that he wasn’t talking about it at all.  “I did want to ask you about something.”

“What’s that?”

“You said part of the reason you want to leave is because you want to get married.  I just don’t understand why you can’t get… Do that, and also stay working for me.” He looked a little sad, like he wanted her to stay for more than just the convenience that she brought him.   _ That  _ confused her more than anything else.  

“Well, Mr. Smith, I’m on call for you all the time. I haven’t been able to go out with friends or my mum since I started working for you. I think most people I know have forgotten about me,” she laughed lightly, trying to keep him from feeling bad, if he could feel bad at all.  “There’s more to life than work.’

He stopped for a moment, fork halfway to his mouth, and set it back down on his plate.  “I suppose you’re right. I’d still like you to stay. And my offer-”

“Mr. Smith, I’m not marrying you.  There’s no…. I just… I don’t know what to say.  Hang on. Is that what this is?”

“What?” He arched his eyebrows in mock confusion.

“Are you trying to get me to marry you?  Is that why you  _ drove to my flat  _ and asked me to come here with you?  That’s why you made me come to lunch with you today?”

“I’m very charming,” Mr. Smith said. “You won’t find a more eligible bachelor than me in the entire nation, and I’d take very good care of you.  My genes are also unmatched.”

Rose narrowed her eyes at him.  “Your genes?”

“Yes.  We’d have very healthy children.”

Rose shot to her feet.  “Mr. Smith. Take me home.”

“We- we’re out on the water, I-”

“I will pretend, for your sake, that this did not happen tomorrow.  I promise. But you don’t understand how women work at all, Mr. Smith.  This wouldn’t win  _ anyone.”   _ She blew out her cheeks.  “You know what, I’ll stay and eat, because I’m  _ starving,  _ but then you’re taking me back home and I will see you at the office tomorrow.”

He looked… Hurt.  His brows were drawn together and he watched her carefully, as though searching for one piece of her that wanted to marry him.  Rose had to acknowledge that he was attractive, but she couldn't do that. She wanted to be in love. She wasn’t sure that he knew how to love anyone, really.  

The silence dragged on for far too long, and she sat back down, beginning to eat.  She didn’t even look at him, hearing him start to eat his own meal. The air was heavy around them, and Rose had thought seconds ago that she’d known why, but now she didn’t.  There was an odd sort of tension that wasn’t there before, and she half wanted to jump into the water and swim back to the pier. 

Then the fireworks started.

Rose jumped at the first one, but upon seeing the burst of color, got to her feet and headed to the edge of the boat.  “Oh,” She said softly. “I wonder what’s going on to cause these?”

Mr. Smith came up next to her.  “I ordered them,” he said, “I thought you might like them.”

She frowned and looked at him.  “Did I ever tell you that I liked fireworks?”

“I heard you tell Martha, once.”

She looked back to the fireworks, letting the exciting, nostalgic feeling coast over her in the most wonderful way.  She found herself smiling a little, remembering parades she’d watched with her mother, picnics in the summer… When she had time.  She remembered then why she was so annoyed with Mr. Smith to begin with. Because he never gave her any  _ time.   _ She ignored the heat of his body next to her as she watched the display, and felt him watch her.

When it was over, she swallowed her pride slightly and looked at him.  “Well, thank you for that. I… The fireworks were nice.”

He smiled, preening a little. “They were, weren’t they?”

The yacht headed back towards the pier, and Rose told Mr. Smith that she’d take a taxi home. 

“I wouldn’t want to inconvenience you, sir.”

“It wouldn’t be inconvenient.”

“I insist,” she smiled her most office-friendly smile at him.  “You drove me out here, and our homes are in completely opposite directions. And we should both be in the office early tomorrow so we can meet with Lynda.”  
He sighed through his nose and turned away from her.  “I suppose, if that’s what you want.”

“It is,” she nodded.  “But thank you for the… Thought.”   _ sort of,  _ she added mentally.  

What she didn’t see was as she walked away to catch a taxi, Mr. Smith pulled out his mobile and dialed in a number quickly.

“Jack? I need to talk to you.”

“Now?” A groggy voice replied on the other side.  “It’s… God, John, it’s midnight!”

“Yes, can I come over to talk to you.”

“You’re my friend, but you’re also my boss.  Am I allowed to say no?”  
“No.”

“Ugh.  Fine, come on over.  I’ll be ready when you get here.”

Mr. Smith hung up, hoping to have this whole thing sorted out before morning.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> COUPLE THINGS regarding this chapter.
> 
> TW for mentioned suicide, NOT any of our main characters
> 
> Yes, John's parents are alive, yes they will be introduced, however, no, they will not be terribly vital to the story.
> 
> Thanks for all your comments! I've loved reading them:) Enjoy!

 

Jack was surprised to wake up to a phone call from John Smith.  He worked in the office but was mostly just a figurehead for the company.  He had been friends with John since they were kids, and while he knew so much about him, he felt like there was something that he was hiding.  

After rolling out of bed and preparing himself for  _ whatever  _ conversation John was about to have with him.  It sounded like it was about a girl, and if Jack knew  _ anything,  _ he knew about what it was like to need to have a conversation about girls.  

About a half hour after their call, a knock ran through the flat.  Jack answered the door to a very bedraggled looking John. 

“Hello,” Jack said.  “Is everything alright?”  
“No!” John entered without being invited in, running his hands through his hair. “I’m sure you know that Miss Tyler is resigning.”

Jack blinked, not sure where this was going.  “Yeah, I’d heard. It’s the talk of the office. I’m sure she didn’t mean for that though.  Is that why you’re so upset?”

“Yes!” John threw his hands up. “Yes.  She says she wants to leave because I don’t give her any time off and she wants to get married.  So I offer,  _ very kindly,  _ might I add, to marry her so she can sort the whole thing.”

“Do you want some tea?”

“What?”

“You’re freaking out and I need to process the fact that you asked your secretary to marry you.  Go sit down in the living room.”

John sputtered for a little bit at Jack’s tone, but did as he was told. Jack raised an eyebrow. He must really need help if he was going to continue to act like this.  He took his time making the tea so the John would have the time to cool down. When he finally made it out to the living room, his friend had settled down a bit, but still looked like he might create havoc if his feelings weren’t approached delicately.  Jack set a mug of tea down in front of him and sat across from him.

“I guess my first question is ‘why did you propose to Miss Tyler’?” Jack said wearily.  “Your  _ secretary.” _

“I told you why,” John replied, looking at Jack as though he was an idiot.  “Because she said she wanted to get married, that was part of the reason she wanted to resign.  So I thought I might fix that part of it for her. She won’t find a more suitable bachelor than me.”

Jack rolled his eyes. “And how have you tried to win her?”  
“Well, I proposed the day she told me she wanted to resign, and she didn’t take that very well.  I don’t know why.”

“God, John, you aren’t dating her.  You thought that she would just say yes because-”

“Because she won’t find anyone better, she can stay working with me, and I’ll give her strong children.”

Jack put his head in his hands. “Oh my God. Please tell me that you didn’t actually say that to her.”

“Of course I did.”

“Oh my GOD.”  Jack looked at him. “Do you even like her?  Or are you just trying to get her to stay? Does she matter to you as a person at  _ all?” _

John blinked, and for the first time in a very long time, Jack saw a flicker of the boy he had known when they were teenagers.  One who had clearly been through some things, but also wanted to live life to the fullest. That boy sat before him for just one moment.

“I- Of course I care about her,” John said, looking vastly uncomfortable, “She’s worked with me for nine years, after all, and we’ve… Met before.”

Jack’s eyebrows shot up. “What? You knew each other before she became your secretary?”

“Yes, that’s why I hired her.  She doesn’t remember, though. Which is fine, but-” His mouth dropped open. “I think I understand now.”

“Do you?” Jack wasn’t so sure.

“Yes.  She always has to run around and pick up flowers for the women that I have to be seen with publicly.  She doesn’t seem to like doing that very much, or any other events that require me to be with another woman… And she did come with me tonight when I asked her.  She-” John got to his feet, one finger in the air. “She likes me. Rose Tyler likes me.”

Jack blinked. “I don’t- are you sure she just doesn’t feel uncomfortable when she’s third wheeling with you and some other girl?”

“She always opens the door when I come round, always answers her phone-”

“-Because you’re her boss.”

“She is attentive beyond belief, is desperately careful to make sure everything is the way I like it.  She wouldn’t do those things for just anyone, those things beyond her job description.”

Jack wanted nothing more than to shake his friend and then possibly throw him out the window.  “John, can you listen to me for a moment?”

John looked at him and sat down once more, now buzzing with energy.

“You seem to want Miss Tyler to like you.”  
“I want her to stay.”

“No, I mean- I think, John, that you don’t want her to leave because you have feelings for her, not because you’ll miss her work ethic.  You’ll miss her because you don’t want to be without her for romantic reasons.”

“That’s ridiculous.”

“John, you just told me that you hired her because you knew each other as children.  And you don’t want to lose her, so your first impulse was to go on and propose. Most normal people would’ve just lightened up on her hours.  Besides that, you’ve never seriously dated someone since you hired Rose.” He studied his friend thoughtfully. “So, all I’m saying is that it’s not unreasonable to think that you have feelings for her.  Do you?”

John crossed his arms over his chest and looked away from Jack sharply. “Of course I don’t.”

“Okay, then let her resign.”

“I can’t do that.”

“Because you need her?”

John huffed. “Because she’s invaluable as an employee and the new woman that she’s had me hire won’t be nearly as good as her, in any sense of the word. I won’t stand for it.”

“This new girl could be the most amazing secretary in the world,” Jack pointed out, leaning forward so that his elbows rested on his knees.  “Did you ever consider that?”

“I am absolutely certain that MIss Tyler is the best secretary in the world.  In fact, I’m absolutely positive of it.” John got to his feet. “I need her to accept my proposal so she’ll stay at the company.”

Jack realized quickly that although he wasn’t going to get his friend to confess his feelings, he also wasn’t going to get him to give up on getting Rose to stay either.  Jack and Rose had spoken quite a few time in the past and were quite comfortable with each other, and he tried to rack his brain to remember if she’d ever said anything about John that would indicate that she was interested.  She looked at him for a little too long sometimes, but John was also objectively good looking and a woman would have to not have any interest in men at all to not look at him.

“So woo her.  Apologize for what you said and did up until now and start over.  You’re charming, John, you could win her over.”

John leaned forward. “Jack, do you know the Spanish for ‘I’m sorry’?”  He asked slowly.

“No,” Jack said slowly, not sure where this was going.

“It’s ‘ _ lo siento’.   _ Say it.”

Jack started to say it, btu the words felt wrong in his mouth.  He laughed and shook his head. “It feels really foreign.”

“Exactly.  That’s how saying ‘I’m sorry’ feels to me.  So I can’t just tell Rose that I’m sorry, even if I mean it.”

“Then show her.  Be nice to her, try not talking about yourself all the time. For the past nine years, John, her life has  _ revolved  _ around you.  Do you know what her favorite color is?”

John opened his mouth, looking smug, but after a few moments the look was gone and he closed his mouth again.  “What does her favorite color have to do with anything?” He snapped, clearly embarrassed.

“It’s her, John. If you care about her, you should care about that.  And don’t deny it anymore. I can tell it’s not just about the job. So start being honest with ehr and yourself. You both deserve it.”

John seemed conflicted by this, and Jack was almost impressed with himself for knocking some sense into his friend.  After a long, nearly painful silence, John finally spoke. “Fine, I should be going.’

“And I should be getting to bed.”

*************************

Rose’s night wasn’t nearly so peaceful.  She’d gone to bed feeling fine, if not a little annoyed at Mr. Smith for his constant indignance.  But she hadn’t been thinking about any past traumas when she’d fallen asleep.

But the claws of her subconscious wrapped around those horrible thoughts, the thoughts she couldn’t even remember all the way, and dragged them to the surface, pushing them into her dreams.

Sweat beaded on her forehead and her sheets tangled painfully around her feet.  The woman was in front of her this time, the noose hung loosely around her neck.

_ “Come with me, little girl.” _

_ “No!!! Mum!!!” _

_ “I am your mum! I’ve told you a thousand times that I am!” _

_ There was another kid with her, and in the back of her mind Rose knwe that whatever this kid did was to protect her. They were older.  He?  _ He  _ was older.  She looked at her hands, wrapped tightly in string.  They were so tiny.  _

_ The woman’s hands reached for her and suddenly different hands covered her eyes, protecting her from a horrible sight.   _

_ Come. WIth. Me. _

_ Come. WIth. Me. _

_ COME. WITH. ME. _

_ She could swear she felt strong arms enveloping her... _

 

_ ********** _

Across town, in a luxury apartment, John was forced to accept the reality that he had some sort of feelings for Rose.  Would he admit those feelings? Probably not. He was far too busy to think of anything of the sort. A man of success had to do a lot to remain successful, and having a relationship hardly fit into that equation.

But… Despite it all, he did think about Rose in a way that was hardly appropriate.  Not that he’d ever know how to tell her. He’d never really had crushes on girls at school, was always taught to be focused on work and other, ‘more important’ endeavours.  And he wasn’t sure he could ever ask. His parents were living, but sometimes he felt as though they might as well be dead, for all they talked to him. They loved him and trusted him to run their company, of course, but he never told them anything that was terribly personal to him.

He laid down in bed and stared up at the ceiling. Should he text Rose, and tell her to come in early tomorrow?  He could bring her coffee, maybe. No. He didn’t know how she liked her coffee. But she knew how he liked his, of course.

Blowing out his cheeks, he rolled over onto his back.  For all the time he’d known her, he really did know so little about her.  He should’ve made more of an effort. Now, it might be too late; she’d be leaving soon.  Lynda was coming in tomorrow, to begin her new job. 

He squeezed his eyes shut. There was no more time to think of such nonsense.  There was nothing between him and  _ Miss Tyler,  _ no future to speak of, and besides, he was far too busy to put work into a romantic relationship.  Jack had probably just tricked him into thinking that he had feelings for her. There was nothing there.  There never had been. 

He huffed, rolling over again to fish the sleeping pills out of his bedside table. He’d never fall asleep like this, his brain rushing on and on.  He took a pill and laid back again. Tomorrow things would be better. They had to be.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My only excuse is midterms, I'm so sorry for being absent! 
> 
> I hope you all enjoy! There's some fluff as an apology

 

Rose was surprised to see Lynda already in the office with Martha when she came in for work the next morning.  She smiled, a little relieved that the girl seemed so on top of things. “Lynda, Martha, good morning,” she said, nodding to the both of them.

“Good morning, Miss Tyler!” Lynda said, dipping her head a little.  Rose greeted her in return.

“Good morning, you’re early!”

“I didn’t want to risk being late for my first day on the job! I hope that’s okay.”

Rose nodded. “Perfectly fine, actually.  Come with me, you’ll be with me at my desk.  Well, it’ll be your desk, soon enough.” 

She led Lynda to their desk and tugged an extra chair over.  Luckily the desk was long enough to accommodate both of them and allow them both to do work at the same time.  Rose sat behind the computer and gestured for Lynda to take the seat next to her. No sooner had they sat down then the buzzer of her intercom rang, signalling that Mr. Smith wanted her in his office.  She tried not to sigh and offered Lynda a smile. “Come on, then, duty calls.”

Mr. Smith was already looking at Rose when they entered the room.  “Ah, Miss Tyler. Good morning.”

“Good morning, Mr. Smith, what is it that you needed?” Rose asked.

“I just wanted to say good morning,” he said simply.  

Rose blinked.  He’d literally never said a simple good morning to her without an attachment in the nine years she’d known him.  She cleared her throat. “Well, your schedule hasn’t changed since yesterday, so you needn’t worry about anything.”

“Good.  You’ll attend my appointments and Lynda will stay here with Martha and the others.”

“Ah, well, shouldn’t Lynda come with us?” 

“Not on her first day.  Hello, Lynda. I’d just like Miss Tyler with me.”

Lynda nodded. “Sure!  I’m sure I can learn some paperwork that I can do before you both go on your events for the day.”

Mr. Smith nodded, his eyes never leaving Rose.  “Right,” he said. “Well done. You are free to go.”  
Rose tipped her head.  “Sure, Mr. Smith.”

The women left the room and Rose blew her cheeks out as they left. “Sorry, Lynda, I would’ve really liked for you to come with us and start to see that ropes.’

“That’s okay, if he doesn’t want me to, I don’t mind,” Lynda replied.  “I’ll be fine.”

Rose sat down at her desk again and started to pull out some of her old files. “Ah, I suppose we could have you go through these, get to know the lay of the land as far as Mr. Smith’s preferences go.  He’s a little strange, has a lot of little idiosyncrasies. I’ve charted absolutely everything since I started working here.”

Lynda looked a little intimidated but smiled brightly at Rose, nodding.  “I’ll be sure to remember it all.”

“Nah, you don’t have to remember it all,” Rose assured her. “Just skim them, get to know most of it.  And they’ll be yours when I leave here. There’s no test,” she laughed, sliding Lynda the first files. “I’m just sorry he’s making you stay here.”

“Would it be alright if I cleaned up around his office, too? I really want to make a good impression. I… I need this job.”  
Rose nodded. “Mr. Smith is a big fan of cleanliness.  I think that’s a good idea.’

Spending the day running to meetings with Mr. Smith was not unusual. Despite his long stride she was used to keeping pace with him and knowing what he was going to ask of her before he even asked it.  She was truly good at her job, and she knew that no matter what, he was going to be at a loss for awhile once she was gone. Part of her liked that, and she felt bad for it.

But today, Mr. Smith was chattier than usual. He’d ask her questions, and then look at her with a deepness that was terribly confusing.  She didn’t think he’d ever looked at her like that before. She didn’t think  _ anyone  _ had ever looked at her like that before.

All of a sudden, her phone chirped and she looked down at it before realizing Mr. Smith probably wouldn’t like that.  She put her phone back in her purse and cleared her throat. “Sorry.”

“No, you can check it if you need to,” Mr. Smith said casually.  He watched as she cautiously checked her phone and then pocketed it without answering the message.  Adam. She didn’t want to see him again, not really. There’d been no connection, and she felt a slight sense of loss from it. She wanted that connection, someone who would love her absolutely, and she just didn’t think that Adam could or would give that to her.

“Who was it?” Mr. Smith asked.

“With all due respect, Mr. Smith, that’s my business.”

“I’m just curious,” he replied, clasping his hands together behind his back. “I don’t mean to offend you, Miss Tyler. In fact, it’s literally the last thing that I would want to do.”  
She blinked.  “Well, that’s appreciated.”

He’d seen it. He hadn’t known the name, but he’d seen it, and for some reason that he couldn’t put a finger on, his stomach had dropped when he’d seen a man’s name on the screen of her mobile.  It was a sort of jealousy he hated experiencing and he wasn’t even sure what to say about any of it. 

He wouldn’t admit that Jack was right, then.  Right about anything he might feel for Rose. Feelings made him weak.  He didn’t need them. But he needed Rose,and that scared him more than anything else.  “Yes, well, you should be allowed to talk to whoever you want.”

Rose blinked again, not saying anything.  His behavior was unbearably odd today, and she wasn’t sure how to talk to him when he was acting like this.  

He was more normal during their lunch appointment with the president of a neighboring company.   He was snarky with her and she took it like she usually did, with a smile and a reply that was just backhanded enough that she could get away with it.  Their lunch partner seemed to enjoy the subtle banter immensely and agreed to work with Mr. Smith on an upcoming project.

“Excellent work, Mr. Smith,” Rose enthused when they left, “It’ll be a very strong year for the company.”

“I wish you’d be around to see it.’  
“Mr. Smith…”

“My offer stands,” he said suddenly.  “It really does. If you wish to stay, if you wanted to be married, to fulfill that part of your dream.”

She saw the earnest look in his eyes, and it scared her a bit.  He was attractive, he really was. A beautiful man, actually. She swallowed hard and looked away from him, needing to not look him in the eyes for a bit.  He had been kinder to her recently, yes, but that didn’t mean anything at all. He was just trying to keep her here. She wasn’t going to let it draw her in.  He was a charming man when he wanted to be and she had a feeling that’s what he was doing. She smiled softly and looked away from him.

“No thank you, Mr. Smith. I really have to insist that you stop asking, too.  I’ll never say yes.”

“I’m sure you know I’m a resilient man.”

“I know.  I think you’ll find I’m even more resilient.”

He smiled at that, almost to himself.  

At the end of their meetings and appointments, Rose joined Lynda back at their desk and Mr. Smith disappeared into his office.  Minutes later a loud cry emanated from the office and Rose leapt to her feet and pushed past Lynda to get to Mr. Smith’s office.  Pushing open the heavy door, she found him curled in the corner of the office, head in his hands, fingers curling into his hair. He was shaking, and Rose’s gaze zeroed in on the zip ties that Lynda must have used to organize Mr. Smith’s cords.  

“Oh, no,” She breathed out, taking scissors from his desk and cutting the zip ties, shoving them at Lynda, who had come into the room behind her.

“Throw these out,” She said harshly, “Are there any more in the room?”

“N-no, I just thought-”  
“You must not have gotten to that file.  We don’t use zip ties here, period.”

“I’m sorry-”

“Just get rid of them.” Rose didn’t mean to be so harsh with her, but she knew how these things affected Mr. Smith.

“Mr. Smith, they’re gone, it’s alright,” she said, kneeling next to him on the floor.  He reached for her hand and she let him take it on instinct, forgetting for a moment, that this wasn’t something they did.  She pulled their hands against her collarbone and leaned forward to rest a hand on his shoulder. “Mr. Smith, it’s fine, please believe me.  They’re gone.”

“I can’t look at them, I can’t.  They have to- get-” He broke down into sobs, his head hanging further.  He looked like he was having a mental breakdown, and Rose was struggling to reach him.

“ _ John,  _ they’re gone.”  She rarely used his name, but she thought this might be an appropriate exception. 

He looked up at her, his eyes red and panicked, tear tracks on his cheeks.  He nodded, his eyes never leaving hers. She smiled, trying to reign him in just a bit.  “It’s alright,” she whispered. “I promise.”

He looked down, his eyes clipping back up to her eyes after a moment.  “Can you look again?”

“Okay,” she said softly, and looked over at where she knew all the ties were gone.  “Okay, they’re all gone, please don’t worry. You can look.”

He still didn't let go of her hand, gripping it like a lifeline. She squeezed it in return, hoping he would loosen his grip on her.

“The slayer of my demons,” he said softly, gazing up at her, and his eyes drifted to the outlets and power strips.  “Ah…” he said softly, ‘Gone.”

“What did you say?” Rose asked, feeling like she’d heard him, but not really sure.

“My… Sorry, I don’t know- thank you.” He released her hand and got to his feet, stumbling a little when he got there.  She stood slowly and watched him, making sure he wasn’t going to freak out any more.

“I should’ve been more careful to warn her, Mr. Smith, I’m sorry,” she said, clasping her hands together in front of her.  “This is my fault.”

“No, it’s not,” Mr. Smith shook his head. “Could you please get me some water though, Miss Tyler?”

“Of course.”  He had a little water cooler in the corner, and she quickly poured him a cup of water and returned to his side.  “Here.”

He looked at her, his eyes still full of shock and fear.  “Thank you.” He took sips of the water and set the cup down only when it was empty.

“Maybe you should go home,” Rose suggested.  “Get some rest.”  
“No, I don’t want to be alone.”  He looked at her, and a small smile made its way onto his face.  “I don’t know what I’ll do without you.”

Rose felt herself blush, and she looked away from him. “Don’t… Don’t think about that just now.  If you’re going to stay here, you should still try to get some rest, okay? You’re going to need it, I think.”  

He nodded.  “Alright. I would… I will call you if there’s anything else.  Thank you, Miss Tyler.” 

She smiled tightly and nodded back to him.  “Of course.”

She sort of hated to leave him, as he still looked shaken, so she brought him another glass of water before leaving the office.  Lynda stood pacing outside, wringing her hands.

“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry, I didn’t know.”

“It’s alright.  I’m sorry for shouting.  It’s not- It’s not a common phobia, the fear Mr. Smith has of ties. I don’t know what it is that causes it, actually.  He doesn’t talk about it. I’m just so used to dealing with it, I didn’t think-”

“You… Calmed him down so fast.”

“Not really.”

“I don’t think he would’ve done so if anyone else had tried to calm him down. He’s really got a connection with you.”

Rose swallowed hard.  “No, I don’t think that’s it.”

But as she sat back down and set Lynda back to work…

She had to wonder if it was.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once more I apologize for the lateness of this chapter: School is the culprit still, I'm afraid.
> 
> There's also a little more insight to the beginning of Rose's start at the company! 
> 
> Enjoy!

“Your brother is coming home.”

John looked up at his mother from the book he’d been reading. “What?”

Mrs. Smith sighed and sat next to him on the couch.  “I know this isn’t want you were anticipating from a visit home, but I think you should know he’s coming back for awhile.  His new book is coming out soon.”

John leaned back against the couch.  “That’s- no, why is he coming?”

“He needs family, John. Why do  _ you  _ visit home?”

John clenched his jaw and looked away from his mother.  His brother- in blood only - had changed his last name and wrote under a pen name, and went by the same name: Harold Saxon. And, to make matters worse, he wrote  _ love novels.   _ John thought it was incredibly disrespectful, as he knew Harold was more about the money than literary art.  The two of them had a very strained relationship for various reasons, and John vowed to himself that he wasn’t going to come back home for anything while his brother was staying.

“And maybe that lovely secretary of yours could come by for dinner-”

“No,” John cut his mother off harshly.  “No, Miss Tyler is not going anywhere near him.  Absolutely not.”

Mrs. Smith raised her eyebrows.  “Oh? And why are you so sensitive about that?”

“She’s… Innocent. I have my reasons, mother.”  He got to his feet. “I should be going, I have some work to do before tomorrow morning. I can’t put everything on Miss Tyler.”  

“You’ve had no trouble doing that before,” Mrs. Smith said, “Why don’t you wait until your father gets home, we can all-”

“I saw him before he left,” John said.  “That’s alright. Call me when Harold leaves.”

Mrs. Smith frowned at her son. “You’re being unreasonable.  You won’t come, you won’t bring your secretary-”

“I don’t want Miss Tyler around the likes of him.”  John reached for his coat. “That’s the last I’ll hear on the subject.”

“Aren’t you opening that library soon?” Mrs. Smith blurted out, and regretted it when she saw the startled look on her son’s face.

“Yes… Next month.  Why?” He asked slowly.

“I think… I think it would be good for you if you let your brother speak there.  Read a chapter of his book or do an interview or something.”

“No.”  
“I’m your mother.  He’s your _brother,_ for God’s sake.  Consider it, please.”  

He stopped for a moment, realizing he might actually have to have his brother at his library opening.  Keeping the family together was really important to him, even if things were very strained between them.  As much as he hated to admit it, he was probably going to have people at his library opening that he didn’t necessarily like, and that long, long list included his brother.  

For some reason, he really,  _ really  _ did not want him near Miss Tyler.  Not that he had a right to say who she saw.  But Harold was very charming, and had been through a fair number of women in his youth.  It was ridiculous, really. John had only had one or two serious relationships, which his brother mocked him for.  But it was hard for him to find women he connected with. John had been through a very traumatic experience, after all, and it was something he never talked about.

But there was one person he  _ desperately  _ wanted to talk about it with.  

“Fine.  I’ll consider it,” he said to his mother, knowing he’d have to invite Harold now.  He’d just… Not tell Miss Tyler about it. That would be alright, wouldn’t it? She didn’t need to know that Harold was coming at all, and besides, she would be at his side the whole night anyway.  He knew it was selfish of him, since he knew for a fact that they wouldn’t be able to train Lynda in a month with all the work that Miss Tyler did, but he was very glad she’d be with him at the opening.  

“Why don’t you call him now?” Mrs. Smith offered.  

“I’ll text him,” John said through gritted teeth, 

The next few days at the office were tense.  John snapped at Miss Tyler more than he would have liked to, and as a result, Lynda looked like a scared deer most of the time.  He felt guilty for it, really, and saw the disappointment on Miss Tyler’s face every time he snapped. 

************

Rose had had  _ enough.   _ Mr. Smith was being ridiculous and she was sick of it.  She knocked on his office door one morning, a little nervous to ask for what she wanted, but needing to do it before she exploded.  

“Come in,” Mr. Smith’s voice echoed past the door and she opened it, slipping into the office.  He beamed up at her when she entered, which took her back a little. “Ah, Miss Tyler. What do you need?”

“I was… I was actually wondering if I could… Have some time off.”

The smile slipped from Mr. Smith’s face.  “What?”

“I just… I really need a day off.  Lynda can take care of everything, it would be a good test run.  I would really appreciate it. And I’ll be right back to work the day after.”  She laced her fingers together in front of her and smiled, trying not to look too nervous.

Mr. Smith dropped the pencil that he had been holding.  “Oh. I didn’t think… Well, you’ll be off permanently quite soon.  Are you still assisting me with the library opening?”

“Of course,” Rose said.  “I would like to see it open.”

“Oh, good.  I’d like you to be there.”

“Thank you.  Is that… A no, then?”  She hated to push him, but she very much needed to have closure on it.

He blew his cheeks out.  “Alright,” he said softly, “I suppose I should let you.  You can have tomorrow off, then.”

She blinked.  She hadn’t actually expected him to say yes, and now that he had, she wasn’t even sure she  _ knew  _ what to do with a day off.

“Thank you, Mr. Smith,” she said, dipping her head slightly.  “I really appreciate it. In the meantime, is there anything you want me to get caught up on before I go for the day?”

He looked up at her, and the way his gaze pierced her was different than the ways he had looked at her before.  This was a look that pinned her in place, kept her from going anywhere, and made her heart inexplicably stutter in her chest.  She swallowed hard and waited what she hoped was patiently, at least to him.

“Can you fetch me some tea?”

She tried not to deflate at his words, though she couldn’t really understand why.  “Yes, sir. I’ll be right back.” 

When she came back with his tea he looked over his glasses at her, regarding her with a scrutiny she was no longer used to.  She used to be, once upon a time, but now he seemed to let her do as she pleased, for the most part. As long as she also did her job in between doing what she pleased.

“What is it?” she asked softly, setting his tea down in front of him.

“Nothing, it’s just that… I don’t think you have once asked for a day off in your time here.”  He seemed a little surprised by it.

She blinked. “No, I haven’t.”

“Not a single time.”  
Rose lifted a shoulder.  “You may have needed me.”

He looked distressed and took his glasses off. “Are you telling me you never took a vacation in nine years because I may have needed you?”

Rose shifted, uncomfortable. “Yes.  You called me some nights when you’d been drinking, I couldn’t let you drive home.  And no one else knows how to do my job. I didn’t… I didn’t think it would be appropriate for me to ask if it wasn’t offered.”

He clenched his jaw and drew his brows together, looking away from her.  “Oh. I… Alright then. You’re dismissed, Miss Tyler.”

She dipped her head in acknowledgement, still desperately confused.  “Thank you, Mr. Smith.”

Once she was out of the room, Mr. Smith blew his cheeks out and put his head in his hands.  He felt awful, and once upon a time, he wouldn’t have been able to put his finger on it. But now, now that he’d admitted to himself what he felt for his secretary, and how he’d been… Abusing her, he felt terrible.  And she hadn’t complained once. She deserved a day off more than anyone in this damn company. 

He suddenly felt very ashamed of himself for treating her so poorly all this time. Someday he hoped he’d be able to make it up to her.  He got an idea shortly thereafter that he hoped Miss Tyler would appreciate. He wasn’t quite sure, but it was something he had a great desire for her to be interested in.  

******

Rose headed back to her desk in a daze.  She had no idea why this was the time that Mr. Smith was alright with her taking a day off, but she wasn't going to question it too much. She sat down next to Lynda and found herself staring off into space.

“Are you alright?” Lynda asked her.

“I’m fine,” Rose said, putting on her most professional smile.  “Yeah, just fine.”  
Lynda beamed cheerfully at her and smiled brightly in response. “Alright.  Can we go through more of these files?”  
“Of course.”  
******************

_ Her first three weeks working for Mr. Smith had been absolute hell.  She’d spent each night when she got home crying, afraid that she would not measure up and he’d fire her before the month was out.  This job paid so well, and she needed it.  _

_ He wasn’t unkind, she didn’t think.  More like… Socially unaware. That had to be it.  He couldn’t mean some of the things he said. Some of the things that shocked her beyond belief because no one had ever said things so blunt to her. _

_ “I heard you asked someone on the phone the other day to speak in English,” Mr. Smith told her on the first day of her second week. “That’s unacceptable.” _

_ Rose blinked. “I’m… I’m sorry, I didn’t know the language he was speaking, and-” _

_ “Then you should learn.  What was he speaking?” _

_ “Uh… Korean.” _

_ “Then you’ll learn Korean.”  He stood and went to his bookshelf, pulling down informative texts on the language.  He passed them to her and she found herself panicking. She couldn’t learn a whole language just for this job!  She’d barely passed elementary French! _

_ Brown eyes dug into her as he waited for her to either accept or decline his offer.  She bit her bottom lip to stop its wobbling and nodded. “Okay,” She said, “I’ll do my best.” _

_ “Good, read chapter one and I’ll quiz you tomorrow.” _

_ Having quizzes bi-weekly with Mr. Smith definitely helped her learn until she felt she was very much on the ball with her studies.  Once she was proficient in Korean several months later, she came to work to find a few textbooks on Spanish on her desk. _

_ “What’s this?” She asked him timidly. _

_ “One should never stop learning, Miss Tyler, and we deal with representatives from all over the globe.  It’s to your benefit to be proficient in numerous languages.” He’d said it so casually, as if it was terribly obvious.  Rose didn’t find it so, and had to bite back tears. She’d never be good enough, would she? She’d been so proud of herself before.   _

_ But she still studied and worked hard, and ended up proficient in eight languages by her fifth year with the company. She was in no way fluent, but she was very proud of the progress she had made with the whole thing.   _

_ She worked tirelessly, with very little thanks from her boss.  But it all had to be worth it, to make the money, to find out more about her past.  All of it. It had to be worth it. _


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> my apologies grow bigger with every chapter. Thank you all for your sweet patience.
> 
> I'm straying from the drama quite a bit, but that's mostly so that the characters fit with the Doctor and Rose more. i hope that's alright with everyone!

_It was a long day.  Her hands and legs were bound, but she was so tired.  She wished she could lay down and go to sleep. The boy next to her was really stiff, like he was scared._

_The house they were in was dark, a little house on the edge of the street that had been abandoned.  She had never been in it before, but now that this lady was claiming to be her mother, was this going to be her new home?  She didn’t want to live here. She looked up at the boy with worry, feeling her face crumpling._

_“I want to go home,” She said._

_The boy looked down at her, wild hair all around.  He was at least a couple years older than her, and had a very sad face.  He reached into his pocket with his bound hands and pulled out a little caramel candy.  “Here,” he said, handing it to her. “Don’t cry, have this.”_

_She couldn’t help but smile at the prospect of something sweet.  “Thanks,” She said softly, and unwrapped the candy before putting it in her mouth._

_“Is it good?”_

_She nodded, smiling up at him.  Maybe it wouldn't be so bad if she would be with this nice boy the whole time._

Rose woke up at ten am, which was the latest she had gotten up in a very long time.  She lay in bed and grinned up at the ceiling, enjoying the calm of not having to sit up in a blind panic and get ready to leave.  She was truly free to do whatever she wanted for a _whole day._ She’d start by laying around for another hour.

At about noon Rose was finally up and about, hair and makeup done and plans to go to a nice cafe with her mother.  She was finished with her makeup when she heard a knock at the door. Frowning, she went to answer it, and was completely shocked to see Mr. Smith standing there, grinning at her.

“Sir, this is my day off,” she blurted out.

“Ah.  Yes, it is.  Well, I was thinking you might want to do something exciting, so I thought I’d come and spend the day with you.”  
It was oddly nice.  Too nice. Rose hated that she was so suspicious of him.  “Sorry, Mr. Smith, I have plans to meet my mum.”

“Oh, well, that’s alright, perhaps I could come along?”

Rose winced. “No offense, Mr. Smith but I need the day off. Completely.  Not to say I don’t like you, cause I do. But if you come with me, I’ll feel like I have to.... Do my job all day.”

“I don’t want that,” he waved his hand dismissively.  “It won’t be an inconvenience to you. I should like for us to be friends, seeing as how my offer still stands.”

She knew what offer he meant, and she had to refrain from rolling her eyes at him.  He really was beating a dead horse. “Mr. Smith, I believe I’ve told you my opinion on that particular matter.”

He frowned.  “I thought you’d be a bit more excited to see me, Miss Tyler.”

She clenched her fists at her side briefly.  “It’s my day off,” she said lamely.

“Yes, and it would be a grand time if we spent it together, don’t you think?  The office can go without me for one day, I should think.”

Rose frowned.  “I’m not sure about that one, Mr. Smith.  You’re very much needed at the office, at all times really.  You can barely take days off.” She knew she was just trying to convince him to go away, and she felt a little bad about it, but she really didn’t want him to come with her.  Mr. Smith had a tendency to make everything about him, and she wasn’t under any illusion that ‘her’ day off was going to be any different.

He pursed his lips, shoving his hands in his pockets. “Well, I think it would still be nice.”

“I’m meeting my mum,” She repeated.

“Then let me take you to dinner tonight,” He said, relenting a bit.  “To say… To say that I’m sorry for everything that’s happened.”

Rose blinked. “Did you just say you’re sorry to me?”

He blushed. “Don’t make me say it again.”

“Have you been talking to Jack?”

“Why, did he say something?”

She bit her lip to keep from laughing, having received her answer just through that. He blushed even darker and shot her a dirty look.  She crossed her arms over her chest, wanting to tease him a little more, but also knowing that it wouldn’t really benefit her to do so. Besides, a nice fancy dinner wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world.

“Alright, I’ll allow you to take me to dinner then,” She relented.  “You can pick, but don’t order for me.”

He nodded, looking far happier than she thought he had ever looked.  “Brilliant. Alright, I will. I’ll come by around seven. Be ready.”

And just like that he was back to his normal self.  He nodded curtly to her and disappeared from her front porch, heading back down to her car.  Rose stood in her doorway for a few more moments, not sure what to make of this. Was he really trying to apologize?  Or was this another elaborate way to try and get her to marry him?

Blowing out her cheeks, she closed the door and went back to finish getting ready to meet her mum.

*****

“I can’t tell you how glad I am that you’re getting away from that miserable man,” Jackie said as the two of them looked at their menus.  The little cafe Rose had taken them to was not really anything special, but Rose was a big fan of it.

“Well, he’s not all the way miserable,” she said softly.  “He’s been… Decent, recently. I think he’s trying to make it right before I leave.”

“He hasn’t tried to make it right with you for nine years,” Jackie pointed out, then took a long, hard look at her daughter.  “You haven’t been sleeping.”

“I have,” Rose protested.

“No, you haven’t.  And it’s no use lying to me, I’m your mum.”

Rose bit her lip and looked back down to her menu.  “Well, I’m still having the nightmares.”

“Oh, Rose.”

“No, it’s alright,” Rose said, “It really is.  I’ve just been thinking about it a lot, and I really want to find the boy that was trapped with me in there.  He has to be out there.”

“Just because he said he’d come see you after it all happened doesn’t mean he could’ve actually come, Rose.  You were both just kids. And besides, that theme park was built over the apartment site. You remember.”

“Yeah,” Rose acknowledged. “I don’t know, I just thought maybe… It’s just a stupid dream.”

Jackie smiled softly. “It’s not stupid. I just want you to be realistic.”

“I think I am.  But to have someone around who had the same experience I did might help. Maybe I’d stop having the nightmares.” She said the last quietly, as though she was just slightly embarrassed by the whole thing.

Jackie reached over and squeezed her daughter’s hand.  “Oh, sweetheart. Then, if it’ll make you happy, then keep looking.

***********

Rose was back at her flat hours later when she heard a knock at her door.  She knew it was Mr. Smith, but she wasn’t sure if she was actually ready to spend an evening with him.  She’d agreed for the idea of free dinner, and was afraid he’d try to turn it into something more.

When she opened the door and he stood there with a bouquet of purple roses, she knew she was right.

“What’s all this?” She asked.

“An apology.  I’m told I’m not good at those.”

“I’d assume Jack mentioned that to you?”

Mr. Smith wrinkled his nose.  “Well, that’s hardly the point, I should think.”

He was right.  She was honestly being a little too hard on him.  Blowing out her cheeks, she took the flowers. “Thank you,” She said, smiling at him.  “You can come in while I put them in water, if you want.”

He nodded and awkwardly followed her into her flat, shoving his hands into his pockets and looking around quite nervously.  She let the silence hang over them, not feeling uncomfortable in the slightest, even though she could tell that he was.

“They’re lovely,” She said, “How did you know I like roses?”

“I thought people might not give them too often because of your name,” he said, “I wanted to be different.”

Rose nodded, realizing she would’ve been foolish to expect a different answer.  “Well, thanks,” she said, laughing a little.

He nodded, not saying anything, and it settled over her that he might see this as a date.  Despite her stoic exterior towards the man itself, she felt her heart trip over itself. He was being kind, after all, kinder than usual.  The optimism in her wanted to believe that he might be a better person before she actually left the company. Besides, he was quite good looking.  It wouldn’t be a horrible night.

“I’ve got us reservations at a restaurant downtown,” he said finally, looking at her with piercing eyes.

“Where?” She asked cautiously.

“Bad Wolf,” he said, daring her to question his choice.

She had to stop herself from physically gasping.  Bad Wolf was _incredibly_ expensive, she hadn’t been there in her entire life.  “Oh, I’ve… I can’t say I’ve ever been there,” she said, forcing a professional smile.

“Well, you’d never talked about going there, so I assumed that was the case,” Mr. Smith replied, “I wanted to give you a different experience.”

It would certainly be different.  One hundred pounds different, really. Rose immediately found herself panicking. She would have to try to pick the cheapest thing on the menu, and then she’d have to act like she belonged at such a place. She was good at faking it, being Mr. Smith’s secretary often meant that she had to pretend to fit in in places that she didn’t necessarily belong.  

“The car’s waiting,” he said blandly after a few moments, and she realized that she’d been staring off into space, or rather, into the flowers she’d set in water.  

“Alright,” She said hesitantly.  She followed him from her flat and to the car that was parked outside her building, engine already running.  She’d ridden in his chauffered car before, but she realized when they approached the vehicle that that wasn’t going to be the case.  He’d simply left _his engine running outside her flat._

“Mr. Smith, that’s not very safe,” She tutted at him, heading towards the driver’s side.  He stopped her with a gentle hand on her arm.

“I’ll drive,” he said softly, almost nervously.  Rose peered up at him, shock evident in her eyes.  He lifted a shoulder. “It’s your day off.”

So it was.

He was a good driver, but Rose had to admit that if she didn’t have to, she probably wouldn’t either.  He looked very focused, hands at ten and two, eyes fixed on the road. She wondered when was the last time he’d _really_ laughed.  She couldn’t remember, and she’d been around him for nine long years.  She cocked her head a little, regarding him carefully.

“You don’t have to do this just for me,” she said softly, “You can have fun too.”  
“Who said I wasn’t having fun?”

“Nobody had to say.  You look very… Stoic.”

He huffed and looked to her and then back to the road.  “I simply tend not to wear my emotions so obviously, Miss Tyler.  It’s a sign of weakness.”  
Rose lifted her eyebrows. “You should know by now, Mr. Smith, that I don’t think of you as weak, and you cracking a smile every once in a while wouldn’t make me think you as such.”  She didn’t know why she was so determined for him to have a good time, but she had a feeling he’d continue to be miserable unless somebody pointed it out to him. Not that Jack hadn’t tried, because she knew he probably had, but maybe hearing it from more than one person would do it.  Well, she could hope, at least.

“Oh, well… That’s always nice to hear, Miss Tyler.  I will miss your words of encouragement.”

She jolted a bit. It was the first time he’d brought up her leaving without making it a game, without asking her to stay or suggesting he marry her.  It was resignation. He was doing this, today, because he wanted to. She wished she could suss out what that meant, but she wasn’t sure she ever could.

“You know, Mr. Smith, I think I might miss giving them.”


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Me, posting semi regularly???????? WHO KNEW!

‘Bad Wolf’ was one of the most beautiful restaurants in the area, and Mr. Smith was being the perfect gentleman, which was also very strange.  He made her stay in the car and came around to open the door for her.

“Thank you,” Rose said sheepishly, taking the hand he extended and letting him pull her up.  She had a little trouble making eye contact with him, and he took her cue, releasing her hand.

“Ah, Mr. Smith!  How good to see you again.  It’s been awhile since you’ve graced our doorstep,” the host exclaimed as they entered.

Mr. Smith offered a charming smile.  “Well, it had been awhile, I was beginning to develop cravings.  This is Rose Tyler, she’ll be joining me this evening,” he gestured to her and she smiled and dipped her head.  She filed away the fact that he hadn’t introduced her as his secretary, just as the woman accompanying him. Without her consent, she found herself admiring his efforts and looking at him with slightly new eyes.

“Well, Ms. Tyler, we’re thrilled to have you here as well.” The host beamed at her and she smiled back.

“Thank you.”

Once they were seated, Mr. Smith’s gaze landed quite forcefully on her.  “How was your day off?”

She blinked. “It was really good, thanks for asking,” she said, “How was the office without me?”

He smiled, but it looked a little sad.  “It was different.”  
She didn’t know how to respond to that, so she looked down at the menu, immediately panicking over the prices of the options.  She blew her cheeks out, nervous to pick something too expensive. She flipped through, looking for something that would be reasonable.

“You can get whatever you want,” he said suddenly.

“What?”

“You can get whatever you want.  Don’t worry about the price.” His eyes were eating her alive.  “You’ve been helping me for nine years, the least I can do is pay for a nice meal for you.”  
She watched him for a moment, then suddenly blurted out, “What’s changed?  Why are you being like this?”  
He leaned on the table a bit, his gaze never breaking from hers. “Because, Miss Tyler, being sharp with you will not make you stay. And neither will being kind.”

Well, at least he’d finally understood. She could respect him for that, at least.  Maybe if they saw each other on the street they would still be able to be friendly with each other. Not that he was often seen outside of the office that much.  She nodded in response to his words, but still felt slightly uncomfortable. She still didn’t feel alright ordering such expensive food. 

“Why don’t you choose for me?” She asked. “I don’t know what’s good here.”

He beamed at that, looking very pleased that she trusted him to order for her. “The lobster here is quite good, I haven’t had it in ages.  However, the steak is also impeccable. They have several dishes that I find to be lacking, obviously, but there are a few that are good.”

In looking at the menu, Rose didn’t think that any of the options would be ‘lacking’, but Mr. Smith had very specific tastes and was very,  _ very  _ particular about the food he ate.  Rose knew that better than anyone.

“Alright, whatever you think,” she said, setting the menu down.

“Would you like a glass of wine?” He asked her.

“No, thank you. Would you like one?”  She was used to deferring to him, after all.

He peered over at her. “Not my day off.”

She decided against it, mostly because she didn’t want to not have full control of everything when she was with him.  Mr. Smith was quite curt with the staff, letting them know in no uncertain terms who he was. It embarrassed Rose, in a way, but this was how he always was. 

Talking was a little awkward, considering how their relationship was strictly professional.  Mr. Smith said something though, that finally caught her attention and held it.

“My brother is coming into town for the library opening next month,” he said, “He’ll be doing a reading of his new novel there.”

“Oh?” Rose furrowed her brow. “He’s not on the schedule.”

“I don’t particularly want him to be but… Immovable forces give me no choice.”

“Funny, I don’t think I’ve ever met your brother.”

He scoffed, taking a sip of water. “Believe me, Miss Tyler, that was not an oversight on my part.”

She furrowed her brows a little. “What?”

His eyes went a bit glassy. “He’s not a good man.”

Rose blinked, but took it at face value because she wasn’t sure that pressing the issue at this particular moment was a good idea.    
“Alright,” she said uncertainty.  “I’ll have to put him on the schedule then.”  She wanted to ask who his brother was, but part of her knew that the reason Mr. Smith hadn’t said anything was because he didn’t want her to know, and she didn’t want to aggravate him when they were in such close proximity.  

Dinner went smoothly, for the most part.  He ended up ordering the steak for her, and Rose found that it was absolutely the best steak she’d had in her entire life, and Mr.Smith wasn’t bad conversation in the right context.  Perhaps he wasn’t as insufferable as she thought he was. 

He drove her home in relative silence, and walked her to her door. 

“Thank you for tonight,” she said, wincing at her own words.  That made it sound far too much like this was a date. And this most certainly was  _ not  _ a date.  He was her boss, and there were numerous other reasons that would  _ not be okay. _

“You’re welcome,” He said, and he looked like he was preening a bit.  Well, back to his arrogant self it was, then. She supposed she should’ve seen it coming.  Just because he’d been decent for the night didn’t mean he was a different man than the one she’d seen the day before at work.the day before.  He was still an absolute dod, and would probably continue to be one in the foreseeable future.

“I’ll see you at work tomorrow,” She said, dipping her head and unlocking her door.  “I’ll get to sleep early and put your brother on the event schedule tomorrow morning as early as I can.”

“Excellent.  Your work is… Outstanding as usual, Miss Tyler.”  He said it quietly, almost with a sort of reverence that she’d never really heard from him before.

“Well, thank you.  Goodnight, then, Mr. Smith.”

He stood there for a moment longer, staring at her, almost asking her to invite him in.  She met his gaze and stared back. She would not be taken down by a man. She didn’t know what he wanted, but with this particular situation, she would assume the worst.  Maybe that was wrong, but her upbringing taught her to be careful. 

“Goodnight.  I’ll… I’ll see you tomorrow.”

He faltered a bit and then nodded harshly before turning back to his car and leaving her standing on her little porch.  She watched him drive away and then went inside her flat. She got ready for bed, still feeling as confused as ever, but not having any idea what Mr. Smith’s ultimatum was.  He’d been genuinely kind and she’d had a… Well, she’d had a nice time. WIth him. 

She shook her head, getting into bed and facing the wall.  She was already sick of thinking about it. 

********

A knock on Jack’s door made him start, but of course he knew exactly who it was.  He rolled his eyes and got up to answer it. “Hello,” he said, looking at John, unamused.  “What can I do for you?”

“I believe I took Miss Tyler on a date tonight, and she still seems unsure of my intentions.”

Jack sighed, stepping back from the door and gesturing towards his living room with a grand, sweeping gesture.  “Come on in.”

Once Mr. Smith was seated, he started telling his story. “I don’t know what to do. I took her to the most expensive restaurant in the city, I was desperately kind to her.  I don’t know what she wants from me!”

“Did you tell her it was a date?” Jack asked wearily.

“What?”

“Oh God, you didn’t, did you?”  Jack put his head in his hands. “John, you have to actually tell a woman you want to date her.”

“I haven’t pursued a woman in years!” Mr. Smith cried out. “Ridiculous! Women fall over me all the time, I have to fight them off.  But suddenly-”

“Suddenly there’s a woman worth fighting  _ for,  _ boss.  That makes all the difference.”  

He frowned, but something in Jack told him he knew he was right.  Rose actually meant something to John, and that’s why it was so hard for him.  And he’d lose her if he wasn’t careful. She already had one foot out the door.

“You think I’m not being forward enough.”  
“I _know_ you’re not being forward enough.”

Mr. Smith frowned and looked down at his hands. “Hm.  Perhaps I should reconsider my methods.”

“You definitely should.”

*****

The next morning, Rose found herself still confused but pushing it all to the side. She hardly had the time to think about Mr. Smith’s weird habits and behaviors.  However, she was still confused, and so distracted that she found herself running into a man in the lobby of the building. “Oh!” She cried out, almost dropping her bag.  

“Whoa, easy there.” The man she’d run into took her by the elbows, steadying her.  He was handsome, all sandy blonde hair and sweet smiles. She found herself smiling back at him without really meaning to.

“Sorry,” She laughed, “Was sort of thinking.”

“No worries.  Quite a good start to my day actually.” The man laughed.  “Harold Saxon, it’s a pleasure to meet you.”  
“Rose Tyler.”  She took a step back, out of his grasp.  “I’ve never seen you in the building before, do you have business with someone?”

“Yes, I’m here to see my brother.  John Smith?”

“Oh!” Rose’s eyes widened.  “You’re the author!”

He winked at her. “Oh, don’t pretend like you haven’t read my books.  Most of the female population has.”  
“I probably have,” Rose laughed good naturedly.  “I could take you up to Mr. SMith, though. I’m his secretary.”

“Funny, he never mentioned having a beautiful secretary,” Mr. Saxon said, almost on a purr, and Rose blushed.

“Well, Mr. Smith isn’t keen on objectification,” Rose smiled pleasantly.  “But I’ll take you to him now, he should be in.” She brushed past Mr, Saxon and walked up the flight of stairs to his office, trusting that the man would follow behind her.  She eased the heavy door open, signaling for Harold to stay behind. “Good morning, Mr. Smith,’ she said upon opening the door. 

“Good morning, Miss Tyler,” He said, removing his glasses and regarding her carefully.  “What is it?”

“Your-”

She was cut off by his phone ringing, and he held up his finger before answering.  “Hello?” He sounded frustrated, and when the person on the other end of the phone started speaking, he only got more frustrated. “What?!”  He said, his voice raising in pitch, “They’re doing  _ what?” _ He looked at Rose.  “We’ll be there.” He hung up the phone and go to his feet.  “We need to go.”

“What’s going on?”  
“Our sweet _rival company_ is opening their media center in two weeks.  They’re trying to beat out our library opening.  So, we need to go to the library to see what we can do to open it early.”

“Right now?”  
“Right now.”  
“Well, alright, but you should know that your brother is here.”  
Mr. Smith froze, a cool mask of indifference settling over his face.  “He spoke to you?”  
‘Yes.”

“Put him on the schedule and send him away.  We don’t need to speak with him today. Then we can go.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please review?


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> some more awkward flirting from our dear Mr. Smith

 

The ride to the library was possibly the most tense ride Rose had ever been on.  Mr. Saxon hadn’t blinked twice and Rose explained he was being turned away. In fact, he laughed a little and shook his head.  He bowed slightly to Rose, looking up at her through dark lashes. 

“I’ll be seeing you again, Miss Tyler.”

Rose blushed a little and dismissed him, and with that Mr Smith’s chauffeur was called and they were sitting side by side, awkwardly stiff in the car.

“What did he say to you?”  John asked quietly, after a few minutes of silence.  Rose didn’t say anything at first, not sure why he was even asking her, what his hostility was towards his brother.

She looked over at him to find him already looking at her.  His eyes were honest, filled with a concern that she couldn’t quite put a name on.  She swallowed hard and directed her gaze forwards, maintaining professionalism.

“He simply asked to see you, Mr. Smith.  You don’t need to be so worried,” she said simply.

“He didn’t say anything-”

Rose huffed, and he stopped himself.  She looked to him and said, quite firmly, “He told me that you never said that you had a beautiful secretary, and I told him that you were not keen on objectification.  Aside from that, our talk was business only.”

He blinked, shocked, but seemed pleased with her answer.  “Well, I simply find it disrespectful of me to call out how lovely you are when you aren’t even there.”

“What?”

He didn’t back down, as she expected him to.  “I said,” he said softly, “I find it disrespectful of me to call out how lovely you are without you present.”  He lifted a shoulder. “I am sorry if that makes you uncomfortable.”

“It doesn’t,” she admitted quietly.  “Quite the opposite, actually.”

He looked a bit taken aback, but not in a bad way.  He seemed quite pleased, actually. He smiled softly at her and nodded.

They didn’t speak the rest of the way to the library, which was usual for the both of them, as Rose often did work in the car and Mr. Smith had a habit of getting lost in his own thought.  Well, when he wasn’t talking about himself, that was. He did really, really love talking about himself. She smiled to herself a little bit. The idea of her boss defending her honor was quite sweet, in a way.  

When they arrived at the library, Rose trailed in behind him.  The building was huge, and they’d been in it before, just not so close to completion.  Many of the walls were glass, and the ceilings were high. It was more of a sort of media center than a library, but Mr. Smith had such love of books that he didn’t really want to call it anything else. And of course, what Mr. Smith said was law.  

“Hello, Mr. Smith,” a skittish Mickey Smith greeted them in the lobby.  Mickey was simply addressed as ‘Mickey’ since he shared the last name with their boss.  It would be a bit confusing to call them both Mr. Smith, the staff had lamented, and Mickey preferred to be addressed informally anyway.

“How is it all looking, Mickey?”  Mr. Smith asked, nodding in greeting.

“Uh, well, with the move up of the date, we’re behind schedule,” Mickey said worriedly, glancing down at his clipboard. “I’m a little worried, honestly.”

“Can it be done?” Mr. Smith arched his eyebrows at him.

“Well, yes,” Mickey said, “But we’ll have to-”

“I’ll come up and work myself if need be,” Mr. Smith cut him off. “It’s of the utmost importance that this is completed, as I’m sure you know.”

“Yes, sir, I was debriefed.”  
“Mickey, why don’t you show Mr. Smith and I what’s completed?  It might ease everyone’s nerves a little bit.” Rose smiled and relaxed when she saw the tension leave Mr. Smith at her words.  It was a little too much for him, really, all of it. Rose could tell when her boss was getting a bit overwhelmed, and this was certainly it.

“Yes, that’s a great idea,” Mickey said enthusiastically.  He led them to a huge room filled with books, seemingly completed.  There was a large sitting room in the middle of it, as well as a few tables on which to read or look at books that one wanted to check out.  

“This section of the library is science fiction, fantasy, and other types of fiction.  Through those glass doors are the reference books, as well as religious commentaries and the like.  Beyond that, science and math, and so on. If you’d like, I could leave you alone and you could look around a bit, make sure everything is up to your standards.”

Mr. Smith nodded, shoving his hands in his pockets.  “I think that would be a good idea. Thank you, Mickey.”

Mickey left the room as quickly as he could, seemingly to attend to the numerous other duties he certainly had.  Rose pasted on her most professional smile and looked to Mr. Smith.

“He’s doing a really wonderful job, sir,” she said enthusiastically.  “Look how much is already done for the library.”

The worry seemed to drain from Mr. Smith. “I suppose you’re right, MIss Tyler.  Your positivity is very encouraging.”

“I do try.”

She started investigating around the library, looking at books from the fantasy section first.  Eventually, she wandered into the romance section and noticed a book that read “Saxon” on the spine. She pulled the book out and read the cover, realizing she’d seen the book before.  Sitting at one of the tables, she flipped through a few of the pages until she got to a scene she recognized. 

“What are you reading?” Mr. Smith asked, standing next to her.

She looked up at him, startled. “Oh.  One of your brother’s books, actually.  I realized I read it before.” She showed him the cover.

“‘Eternal Love’,” Mr. Smith huffed out a laugh. “Really?”

Rose sniffed. “Well, no one said you had to like it,” she said, “I just remember enjoying it when I read it.”  She looked back to the book, fingering through the pages. Mr. Smith made another sound that sounded suspiciously like a second huff.  Rose ignored it, hoping that he would stop acting so ridiculous. His attitude was half endearing, half cripplingly annoying. Often times she found if she ignored him, he would go away.  This time, however, he stayed standing near her, right by her shoulder. She had a suspicion that he was trying to actually read the book over her shoulder. 

“See, oh, I remember this part,” she said excitedly, thoughts of ignoring him forgotten.  “‘ I want to be in the kind of relationship where I feel like the tiredness of my day gets washed off just by hugging you once, even if you don’t make my heart flutter every second’.  Isn’t that nice?”

“That’s childish,” Mr. Smith snapped.  “I don’t know how he writes such rubbish.”

Rose sniffed, flipping through the book.  “Well, it’s the sort of love I dream of, anyway.”  

He was quiet then, and hummed a little after a few moments. “I never told my brother… But have I ever told you that you’re lovely?”

Startled, she made to look up at him and speak to him about it, but all of a sudden the room went dark around her.  She glanced up at him, startled, and saw the glint of the whites of his eyes as he looked around as well.

“What’s going on?” Rose asked softly.  “There’s no rain or anything.”

“I don’t know,” Mr. Smith said, and Rose watched his jaw work as his frustration mounted.  She could practically sense his anxiety and swallowed hard when his eyes locked back onto her.  “We should go find Mickey.”

Rose got to her feet.  “Okay.” She started to follow him from the room and hit her foot of the table leg, hissing in pain at the force.

She was surprised when Mr. Smith materialized in front of her, hands on her upper arms.  “Are you alright?” he asked softly, searching her eyes. She blinked, his closeness and the gentleness of his demeanor throwing her for a bit of a loop.  He was almost right up against her, fingers touching but not digging into her skin.

“Yeah, I’m alright, I just hit my foot off the table.”

“Can you walk? Your heels-”

“I can walk,” she assured him, offering him a smile.  “Just startled me is all. It’s alright.”

He looked at her for a moment longer and then pulled back, nodding.  He let go of her arms and she suddenly felt cold as a result. Surprise washed through her as he offered her his hand.  

“What?”

“It’s dark, I can see a little better than you. I don’t want you to fall.”

There it was, that touch of arrogance in his voice, but underneath it was something very genuine.  She nodded slowly, watching him carefully. He glanced down at his hand and back at hers, and she came to the conclusion in her mind that letting him guide her through the dark hallways to find Mickey wouldn’t be such a bad idea.  She slid her hand into his and felt tension leave his body at the action. Part of her immediately wanted to ask about it, but he was so guarded… Would he even answer her?

He pulled her out of the room and down the hallway they’d come down, in search of Mickey.  There weren’t enough windows installed to let them see out, and Rose found herself squinting into the dark.  She wasn’t sure exactly where they were headed, if they were headed back the way they came or somewhere else, but Mr. Smith had been pouring over the blueprints for this building for months, so he definitely knew where they were going.

She trusted him, she realized suddenly.  That regardless of what their relationship was, if she was just his secretary or if he actually cared about her, she trusted him with her life.  When it came to it, no matter what, he would make sure she was alright. She wasn’t sure she would’ve thought that just two months ago, but the way he’d been opening up to her recently… She wasn’t sure.

Was he just trying to convince her to stay without words?  Surely after nine years he’d know her better than that. She wasn’t one to be easily persuaded, and he knew that to be true.  She bit her lip to keep herself from saying anything to him about any of it. It wouldn’t do to pick his brain about the situation, especially at a time like this.  Or any time at all, for that matter. It would be… Completely inappropriate.

So instead of thinking about their confusing relationship, she thought about the way his hand felt in hers.  It was an odd feeling, it had been a great, long while since she’d held hands with someone for so long. His hands were soft and dry, not gripping her too tightly.  Actually, it was quite nice. She felt oddly safe. Protected. Especially after he’d been so concerned when she’d hit her foot.

Right.  Perhaps that train of thought wasn’t quite safe either.  What had gotten into her?  
“Mr. Smith, do you know where you’re going?” She asked, distracting herself from her own thoughts.  

“Of course,” he replied.

“No, I think we passed where we were supposed to come from.”

“Are you wearing perfume?”

She blinked. “What?”  
“I just smell perfume.”

“No, I- it must be my shampoo you’re smelling.  Your senses are better in the dark, you know.”

“Ah yes, that… That must be it.”

Rose glanced around, her eyes locking on the door she was now certain they’d come through.  She tugged on his hand. “Follow me, sir, I really think it’s this way.”

He was stiff against her pulling for a moment, but finally relented.  She took him to the front of the building, where Mickey was standing, clipboard in hand.  She released his hand, but he hesitated before releasing hers.

“I’m so sorry boss, I don’t know what’s going on, but we’re getting to the bottom of it, I promise-”

“It’s okay, Micks,” Rose cut the distressed young man off, smiling.  “We’re gonna go, but the place looks great. Isn’t it great, Mr. Smith?”  
“Yes, Miss Tyler, I rather think it is.  But she’s right, we have plenty of work to get done at the office.”  Rose could feel him staring at her, probably wondering why she was taking control so forcefully.  She forced the smile to stay on her face, afraid of what sort of gentle things he might say to her if she let her guard down even a little.

Well… Perhaps she wasn’t afraid that he would say them.

Perhaps she was afraid that she would like it.


	11. Chapter 11

 

Later that night, after leaving Mr. Smith, very shaken up, Rose went to dinner with her best friends from school, Keisha and Shireen. She saw precious little of them, with her work with Mr. Smith, but he let her go early as a thank you for all her help.  He  _ never  _ let her go early, not really, but she wasn’t about to tell him no.  Instead, she had just beamed at him and gathered up her things, giving Lynda a few more tasks to complete before bolting from the building.  Mr. Smith had watched her leave from right outside his office, hands in his pockets and a small smile on his face.

“What are you thinking about?” Keisha asked, breaking through Rose’s thoughts.

Rose blinked and focused in on her friend. “I don’t know,” she said, “Just a long day at work, I guess.”

“Well, cheers to you being done soon,” Shireen laughed, lifting her glass of rum.

Rose laughed, cheersing her and Keisha with her own glass of wine.  “Yeah. I’m finishing training the new secretary and tie up a few loose ends and then I’m out of there.”  She almost got lost in thought again but shook herself.

“Whoa, what was that?”

“Yeah, I just- I’m trying to think of events for the library opening, I know Mr. Smith is worried about it and we’ve got a lot to think about.”  She smiled sheepishly. “I guess even when he lets me off the hook early I’m not entirely off the hook.”

Shireen winced. “Look, babe, you gotta stop thinking about working for him all the time.  It's not that big of a deal! The library opening is his problem, not yours. You’re leaving!”

Rose scratched her neck, her eyes darting around the restaurant.  “Yeah, see, I know that, but-”

“You don’t like him, do you?”

“Well, sure I like him, he’s my boss.”

“No, she means, do you  _ like  _ him?” Keisha giggled.  “You’ve been preoccupied with him since we got here!”

Rose felt a hot blush color her cheeks and she shook her head. “No!  No, of course not. That would be ridiculous! He’s my boss, after all.  Even though I’m quitting, it would still be incredibly inappropriate.” 

“Me thinks the lady doth protest,” Keisha muttered.  “He  _ is  _ fit, but remember, Rose, he’s also been an absolute ass.”

Rose chewed on her bottom lip, watching her friends carefully.  “Nah. No, it’s not like that. It’s really not.”

In the back of her mind, though, she was starting to wonder.  Mr. Smith was being incredibly kind to her, though it couldn’t just be because she was leaving.  Of course, that could certainly be a part of it, but just the fact that he had changed so recently made him think that he might actually just need to have her around.  Not necessarily as a business venture, but just as a person. As a friend. 

She shook her head. “Let’s not talk about my boss anymore, yeah? I just now got away from him.”

*******

John was staring at himself in the shot glass, ignoring Jack next to him.  What a day it had been. Being in the blackout at the library, he’d expected more panic out of Miss Tyler.  Instead, she’d been incredibly level headed and was a bit smarter than him, really. It had surprised and intrigued him quite a bit.  

“So, heard there was a little issue at the library today,” Jack said, tossing a shot back.  “How are you feeling? Stressed out, eh?”

He shook his head.  “Not really. Miss Tyler was quite level headed, I hardly had any stress at all, actually.”

He remembered how Miss Tyler had claimed she knew the way, taking his hand and leading him out.  She’d exuded calm, and an odd sort of attraction had run through him when he’d caught the scent of her shampoo.  He smiled a little. “It was sort of fun.”

“Fun?  You, having fun?” Jack laughed, “I don’t believe it.”

“Well, you should!  I did, it was a nice time and I feel quite good about the opening of the library.  It should go off without a hitch at this rate.”

Jack watched him carefully.  “You never would’ve thought it was a nice time if Rose wasn’t with you and you know it.” 

“I never suggested otherwise,” John said, furrowing his brow.  “I enjoy Miss Tyler’s company, we’ve discussed this.”

“But you haven’t told her your true feelings, have you?  You haven’t asked her out on a proper date.”

“Of course not.”

“Ugh,” Jack hung his head. “You like her. You said you think she likes you.  I don’t know what the problem is.”

John was finished talking about it.  There was nothing to do for it, really.  Miss Tyler was simply out of the question, and that was that.  

Jack knew, deep down, that he would be too prideful to actually ask her out.  No matter how badly he wanted to be with her. In a way, Jack felt bad for his friends.  John would never actually be brave enough. And he might miss out on something amazing because of it.

“Why are you looking at me like I just kicked your dog?” John snapped suddenly.

Jack shook himself, realizing his forlorn look had actually been boring into his friend. “Sorry, no reason,” he said, shaking his head. “Just thinking about what it might be like to miss out.”

John furrowed his brows. “You are a very strange man, Jack.”

“Yeah?  So are you, pal.”

*****

Strangely enough, John did feel a sort of magnetism to Miss Tyler the next day at work. He kept finding himself wanting to call her into the office just to see what she was doing, or to chat with her, or ask her how her night off was.  Had she enjoyed herself? Had she gone on another date with that man? He didn’t even want to think about that. 

After about the eighth time he almost called into his office, she buzzed in to him. He answered immediately.  “Yes, Miss Tyler?”

“Good morning, Mr. Smith.  I have finalized the schedule for the library opening but I’d like to run it past you, if that’s alright.”

“Come in.”

She buzzed off and a moment later was opening the door.  She smiled a little and closed the heavy door behind her, approaching his desk with a manilla envelope in hand.  “Here it is.” She flipped the cover off of the envelope and read out, “So, in the morning, it would be general mingling of the patrons, and those who have given support to the build as well.  Over the course of the day there will be numerous presentations of how the new technology works, as well as tours of the facility. Mr. Saxon will end the night with a reading from his new, unreleased book.”  She closed the envelope and beamed at him. “What do you think?”

He nodded.  “Good idea,” he said, “Did you… Speak to my brother about this?”

“Yes, I contacted him about the timing as well as the idea to read from an unreleased book.  It adds intrigue, after all.”

“I don’t want you contacting him after this,” Mr. Smith said firmly.  

Rose frowned. “Does the schedule work, then?”

“Yes, it does.”  He wasn’t sure why he was so upset by this, but the idea of Rose speaking privately to his brother was very upsetting. 

Rose was about to storm out of the office, but stopped when she noticed that Mr. Smith’s tie was aggressively crooked.  “Your tie…” She came around the side of the desk and turned his chair a little. Mr. Smith looked up at her, startled, as she set down her envelope and reached for his tie, straightening it out.  He stared at her, his eyes wide, as though she hadn’t done this a thousand times before. She secured the knot under his adam’s apple and smiled at him, but it faded when she saw his shocked expression.  The two of them stared at each other for a long moment, two puzzle pieces clicking into place. Rose cleared her throat suddenly and was surprised when Mr. Smith jumped at the noise.

“Excuse me, Mr. Smith, I’ll be sending the schedule out now,” She said, taking a step back from him. She’d been further in his personal space than she’d original thought, and it was making her hands sweat. She had to get out of there. She dipped her head politely and tried very hard not to trip over her own feet on the way out.

“Ah… yes.”  He watched her leave the room, and settled his hand over his chest when the door closed behind her. “Why is my heart beating so fast?” He murmured, “Perhaps I should see a doctor.”

When Rose left the office, she saw John’s mother standing at her desk.  “Oh!” Rose hurried to the other side of the desk. “I’m so sorry to keep you waiting, Mrs. Smith.”

“Oh, don’t worry, dear.  I just wanted to stop by and ask John to come over for dinner tonight.”

Rose flipped open her planner. “Well, he’s free tonight, and I can see to it that there are no appointments made, if that would suit you?”

“That would be perfect, dear.  Would you come along as well?” 

Rose blinked. “W-why?  With all due respect, Mrs. Smith, I don’t think I quite belong at a family dinner.”

“You’re the only person my son trusts, Miss Tyler.  I would really like to have you there. And, well, my other son will be there as well, and there’s a bit of friction between the two of them.”  
Rose winced.  “I did notice they didn’t get along exceptionally well,” she said, “So if you’d like, I can come. You may want to ask Mr. Smith to confirm, though, he usually likes to know exactly what’s going on all the time.  It’s one of his charms.”

Mrs. Smith laughed.  “Oh, yes.”

Rose buzzed in on her intercom. “Mr. Smith, your mother is here to see you.”

“Thank you, Miss Tyler. Send her in.”

Mrs. Smith offered Rose a smile before disappearing in to see her son.  Rose heard Mr. Smith groan in agony when Mrs. Smith told him that his brother would be attending the dinner, but she didn’t hear him refuse. She supposed even big, powerful CEOs of companies had to listen to their mothers sometimes. She stifled a laugh at the thought.  

A few minutes later, Mrs. Smith exited the office and offered Rose a smile.  “Well, we’ll be seeing you tonight then, Miss Tyler! You might have to cheer John up on the way over, though.”

Rose kept herself from wincing.  “Yes, Mrs. Smith. I’ll make sure we’re not late.  I wouldn’t want to keep you waiting.”

She watched the older woman leave the building and sighed heavily, putting her head in her hands. Dinner with her boss’s family, mere weeks before she was leaving the company?  Just how stupid was she?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please review?


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> some secrets are to be revealed....

Rose sort of stewed in her discomfort for the next few hours, mindlessly showing Lynda the rest of her files that she could use in the future when it came to Mr. Smith.  Rose had loads of information and she wasn’t sure that Lynda was going to be able to handle absolutely all of it. The resume had been building with her career, after all, so there was  _ so much  _ to be learning all at once.  

“I’m sorry if this is overwhelming you,” Rose finally said, wincing a little.

“Oh, don’t feel bad! I knew it was gonna be a lot when I came on,” Lynda beamed.  “Besides, I heard Mr. Smith’s mother invited you to dinner, so that sounds like it might be pretty… Stressful.”

Rose laughed, but it didn’t even sound real to her.  “Yeah, well, that’s alright. I don’t mind. I’ve never eaten with them, obviously, but it should be alright.  They’re good people.”  
“At their house, though?  That’s pretty intimate.”

“Yeah, I suppose it is,” Rose said, “Still, they might just be doing it as a way to say goodbye to me.  They all know I’m leaving, or at least I think they do.”

Lynda leaned towards Rose a little, looking around to see if anyone was listening. “I heard his brother is coming to the dinner as well, the author?  He’s so beautiful! Have you seen his photos?”

“Yeah, he’s good looking, I guess,” Rose said, lifting her shoulder.  “I’m not really looking to do anything but my job there, though.”

Lynda looked chastised.  “Yeah, no, I didn’t mean to imply anything else by that. Just that… he’s gorgeous.  Mr. Smith’s brother I mean. Not that I would ever- and not that you would ever-” She blushed. “Never mind!”

Rose had to laugh a little.  “No, it’s alright. It’s not that big of a deal, you can speak your mind around me. I just don’t want anyone to get any… Ideas.”

*****

The night, Rose drove Mr. Smith’s car back to his family’s home.  She’d only been there once before to pick up some files from his father, so to say she was nervous to get something wrong, in or outside of the house, was a great understatement.  Mr. Smith was also shifting around in the seat next to her, clearly nervous as well. She already knew that there was something about his brother, that, for whatever reason, he didn’t like.  Rose was desperately curious about that, and wanted to ask him what was wrong with him, but while they knew each other quite well, it wasn’t ever going to be appropriate for her to ask such a thing.  She chewed on her bottom lip as she drove, not even sure what she could try to say.

“What are you thinking about?” Mr. Smith blurted out suddenly.

Rose blinked.  “Well. Just dinner I suppose, I’m surprised your mother tried to invite me.”

“I’m surprised you said yes,” he shot back.

“With all due respect, Mr. Smith, I don’t think it was really much of a choice.  I can take a taxi home early at any point, all you have to do is say the word.” She tried to keep herself calm, hoping he’d send her home  _ as early as possible. _

“No… It might be better for you to be there actually. I’d like it if you’d be there.”  He wasn’t looking at her, but he never did when he said something that might seem a little bit heartfelt.  She smiled a little.

“Okay, Mr. Smith.”

They were silent until they arrived at the Smith household.  Rose followed Mr. Smith at a slight distance, partly because she didn’t really want the Smith family to think that they were arriving together or anything like that.  She laced her hands together in front of her and wondered why, exactly, she felt so nervous. 

Mr. Smith looked back to her several times as they made their way up the walkway, which he usually didn’t do when she walked behind him. She smiled reassuringly to him and he offered her a tight smile in return.

To Rose’s surprise, he didn’t even knock on the door before opening the door and heading into the house.  A light, chiming bell rang through the house and from around the corner, Mrs. Smith appeared, beaming happily.  

“Oh, you made it!  Harry and your father are already sitting down, ready to eat. I knew that you and Miss Tyler might end up staying late at the office.”  She smiled and embraced her son, who seemingly reluctantly hugged her back. Rose smiled a little bit at the sight and nodded when Mrs. Smith grinned at her.

“Harry has been quite excited to meet you, Miss Tyler,” Mrs. Smith said.

“I’ll bet he has,” Mr. Smith muttered, and Rose looked over at him, puzzled, not quite understanding what the problem with that was.  

They walked into the dining room, which had many glass doors and windows surrounding it.  It wasn’t terribly homey, but Rose found that it was definitely quite nice. Harold was sitting across from the elder Mr. Smith at the table, both of whom stood up when the rest of them entered.  Harold turned a very charming smile on Rose, nodding to her. 

They all sat down, Rose next to John, who sat next to Mr. Smith.  Harold and Mrs. Smith sat across from them. They mostly spoke of business, which Rose would have usually paid intense attention to, but with her leaving the company, she didn’t really care much for the future of their business ventures.  Of course, she still wanted them to succeed, but it hardly concerned her anymore. She focused on the food, which felt a bit too fancy for her, but she was certainly enjoying. 

“And Miss Tyler, what has life brought your way lately?” Harold asked, smiling at her.  

She looked up from the steak medallions on her plate and blinked. She’d expected to blend into the woodwork, and hadn’t necessarily thought that someone would address her directly.  “Oh. Um, well… Not a whole lot, to be honest. I’m very preoccupied with the opening of the library.”

“Oh, but surely even you need a break sometimes.”

“I don’t… I don’t mind,” she said slowly as she felt Mr. Smith, or John, rather, tense up next to her.  

“Well, I’m sure you’re doing an excellent job.  I’m looking forward to reading at the opening.”  
“I’m sure you are,” John snapped.  “I’m only doing that for our parents.”

The rest of the dinner went equally awkwardly, until something Mrs. Smith said piqued Rose’s interest.

“Well, Harry, I’m glad that your experiences are feeding your creative energy.”  Mrs. Smith grinned. “It can’t be easy to write about that day.”

John stiffened next to Rose, clenching his fist over his knee.  Rose looked between all of them, wondering what, exactly, that meant.

“Oh, Miss Tyler, I suppose you should be let in on the family secret,” Harold smiled at her.  “When I was a young child, I was abducted by a woman who claimed to be my mother. There was a young girl with me there, but we’ve never been able to locate her.”  

Rose thought that John’s cheek muscles might rupture, the way he was clenching his jaw. She looked between the brothers and swallowed hard, her mind racing.  That sounded very similar to the day she’d had, but she couldn’t quite remember the boy she’d been with. Could it have been Mr. Smith’s brother all along?

“I-” She opened and closed her mouth. “Pardon me, Mr. Saxon, but… Was this the house on Pine Street?  The abandoned one?”

“Yes!  Did you hear about it?”  He leaned forward on his elbows, eyes glinting.

“Oh, um, more than that, I think,” she said, looking around with uncertainty, feeling the nervous energy of the man next to her and the curiosity from everyone else.  “I… When I was about five or six I was taken, but I don’t… There was a young boy there, but I never thought about who it might be. Or I did, but I never thought that he’d be…” She gestured to Mr. Saxon. “It was only a day, but I remember it as if it was yesterday.”

“My!” Mr. Smith’s eyes widened.  “I suppose we never thought we’d find you either, Miss Tyler.”

“Perhaps we should meet up and discuss it outside of here,” Mr. Saxon said hurriedly, “I think it might help us to get past it.”

Rose nodded slowly, still feeling a bit shocked.  “I… I suppose that would be alright.”

“Excuse me,” John said tightly, getting to his feet and leaving the room. 

“Oh, John!” Mrs. Smith called after him, but her call was ignored.  She sighed heavily. “He always gets so sensitive when we talk about this.  He really should manage his emotions better.”

From what Rose had seen in the nine years she had worked for John Smith, she knew he was anything but out of control when it came to his emotions.  “I’ll go check on him,” She decided, choosing to ignore how Mr. Saxon’s face fell as she stood.

She found him in the gardens out back, staring at a bush without really seeing it.  She came up next to him, simply standing next to him for a moment. She could tell that he knew she was there, and was just choosing not to acknowledge her.  He must be more upset than she thought. Although, what exactly was upsetting him, she was having trouble uncovering. After a few minutes of standing in silence, she decided to risk speaking to him.

“Are you alright, Mr. Smith?”

“Perfectly! What would make you think that I wasn’t?”

“Pardon me, Mr. Smith, but although we’re among your family, I would venture a guess that I know you the best out of anyone here.”

He turned a gaze on her that was surprisingly soft, and made her blink in surprise.  “Yes, Miss Tyler, I think I would be inclined to agree with that.”

“So will you tell me what’s upsetting you?”

“I don’t like to talk of my…  _ Brother’s  _ capture.”

“Would you be upset if I met with him then?  If it was him who I was with, in that house?”  She needed answers, had always needed them., but Mr. Smith’s feelings on the subject were also strangely important to her. 

He started to shake his head, but stopped.  “Yes. I will be upset. But I also can’t tell you not to.  That would only make you resent me, and I really don’t want that.”  
She continued to wonder what, exactly, about this situation made him so upset.  It wasn’t as though it involved him, not really. She sighed heavily. “Well, I appreciate your honestly, Mr. Smith, but I think it would be a good idea for me to meet with him, you know?”

His shoulders slumped a little bit. “Yes.  I understand.”

She rubbed his arm with one hand, trying to reassure him, and he offered her a smile in return, though a weak one.  It wasn’t often that he offered her this kind of reassurance, so she enjoyed it whenever she did get it. 

“Are you ready to go back in, then?”

“You didn’t have to come get me.”

She shook her head. “No, I didn’t.  I wanted to see if you were alright.”

That seemed to put him in a good mood, and he allowed her to lead him back to the dinner table.  It was a bit of a tell, she thought, that she was the only one that had made to go after him what he was visibly upset. 

After dinner, she and Mr. Saxon exchanged phone numbers, and he told her that he would be in touch to meet up at a cafe or the like to discuss everything that had happened when they were children. She felt a bit of relief cut through her at the thought that she’d finally found the boy who had suffered with her that day.  She finally didn’t feel so alone. 

***********************

In her dreams that night, she dreamt of that fateful day, but the vision of the boy was shaky in her mind.  He didn’t look like Mr. Saxon. At least she hadn’t thought it had. Had he been blonde back then? The boy that was with her… Hadn’t been blonde. She was actually sure of it.  Or maybe she wasn’t. 

_ “Just look at me, Rose! Don’t look anywhere else.” _

_ ************************ _

_ “Sir, we’ve a new application coming in.”  _

_ “Alright, who is it then?  Give it here.” _

_ “It’s from a Rose Tyler.” _

_“Rose Tyler??”_ _  
__“Yes sir.”_

_ “Hire her.” _

_ “Sir?  She’s incredibly unqualified to be a secretary, she has no experience.” _

_“Jack, I said hire her.  I want her to get the job.  This is not up for debate.”_ _  
__“Sir, you’re going to be the death of me.”_

_ “That’s fine with me.” _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> please review?


	13. Chapter 13

Later that night, after Rose had gone home, John got a call from Jack regarding everything that would be happening with the library opening, and suddenly he felt very overwhelmed by the whole thing.

“You couldn’t call Miss Tyler about this?” He snapped finally, glancing at the clock.  It was just past eleven pm.

“Because she deserves a break and this is  _ your  _ library, John!  If you really want someone to talk to her about it, you could go talk to her!”

“Fine, I’ll drive over there now.”

“Oh, my God, you know that’s not at  _ all  _ what I meant.”

John didn’t listen and instead hung up on his friend, ignoring him when he called him back three separate times.  He got in his car and drove to Rose’s flat, parking on the street and getting out of his car in record time. He stood on the sidewalk in front of her flat for just a moment, not sure whether or not to actually go in.  He breathed out a sigh and turned back to his car in time to see her walking towards the flat, a shopping bag in her hand and her mobile in the other. She was reading something on it, scrolling quickly and not paying attention to anyone in front of her.  As she passed him, he laid his hand on her shoulder, causing her to jump and throw her phone. John reached out and grabbed it out of the air. 

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you,” he said, handing her phone back to her.

“Mr. Smith, what are you  _ doing  _ here?”

“Jack gave me a call about the library opening,” he said lamely, sort of feeling like he hadn’t thought this out quite enough.  He’d just been stressed and his first thought had been to go to Miss Tyler. He opened and closed his mouth, as though he was going to say something else, but ended up not saying anything at all.

Rose raised her eyebrows at him.  “Okay… You’re acting weird, are you feeling alright?”

“Yes.  No. I have a lot to think about.”

Rose smiled a little, sympathy coloring her features.  “Me too. I was going to make homemade macaroni, do you want to come in?”

He nodded quickly, probably a little too quickly, but it made her laugh a little, so he decided it might be alright.

She led him inside her flat, which he realized quite suddenly, he’d never really been inside.  It was a quaint place, and he watched her rush to tidy up the shoes and clothes that were strewn about.  The kitchen drifted right into the living room, which morphed right into the bedroom. It was almost all one room, save for the bathroom, tucked neatly away in the corner.  After nine years, was this all she was able to afford? He almost felt guilty for his large, impressive home. He was the only one that lived in it, and he’d be lying if he didn’t say that sometimes it felt a little lonely.

Rose’s home, though, wasn’t at all cold.  It was filled with her own personal little touches, fake plants and a stuffed animal set up neatly on the bed.  It was clearly the place of someone who loved living, and loved everything around her. He watched her hurriedly tidy up and realized, perhaps not for the first time, that she was the most remarkable woman he had ever known, and he wanted to give her absolutely anything that he was capable of giving her.  It was a realization that slapped him in the face. He cared for her far more than he originally thought. He didn’t just have a crush on her. This was… Something stronger. To the point where he was honestly afraid to be without her. When she left, and left him behind… What would he even begin to do?

“Well, I’ll start off boiling the water then, it shouldn’t take long, but it’s good comfort food.”  She offered him a smile that he was no convinced could power every light source in the country. He smiled back, more on accident than with any force.  

He watched her bustle around the kitchen, not really talking to him but also not ignoring him.  Finally, as her cheese was cooking in a fry pan on the stove, she turned to him and put her hand on her hip.  “Is the library opening stressing you out?” She asked finally. “I know you don’t like to talk about that stuff, but I might be able to help.”

“I- I just needed to not think about it,” he admitted, “I don’t… My brother and I aren’t exactly on the best terms, you know.”

“I noticed.”

“My mother insisted he be allowed to be part of the festivities.”

“Also something that doesn’t surprise me,” Rose smiled.  “Your mum is a whirlwind.”

He huffed out a laugh and looked away from her.  “I suppose she is.” He said, “But so are you. In a good way, I mean.”

“Well, thanks, I try to get the job done.”  Her voice had a devil-may-care attitude, but he saw a blush crawl up her neck and laughed a little. 

“I don’t tell you enough what a good job you do,” he said softly, “I apologize for that.”

Her startled gaze met his.  “Oh, thanks. You don’t have to tell me though, having this job has been very satisfying and I’m grateful for all the opportunities you’ve offered me through it.  Maybe it’s me who should be thanking you.”

“Let’s just agree that we’re both thankful.”

She smiled. “I like that.”

Soon enough, she had everything squared away, and he realized he’d never seen his mother cook.  There had always been people for that. But there was something about watching Rose cooking, preparing a meal for the two of them, that made his perception of her shift even more.  Sure, when he’d asked her to marry him at the start of all this, it had been a ploy to get her to stay, but a deep longing stirred in him at the idea of having her next to him in every possible way.  She must be magic, no woman had ever done that to him before.

“Why are you staring at me?” She asked as she set two bowls down on the tiny table that graced her kitchen.

“You’re remarkable.”

“It’s just mac n cheese, but ta, I guess.”

“That’s not what I meant.”  
She shook her head and fetched a glass of water for him before sitting down across from him, offering him a bright smile.  “Well, go on, tuck in.”

He did, and was surprised by how good the food actually was. He’d watched her prepare it and had been a little wary of the cheese she’d melted, wondering about all the chemicals that were placed in such processed foods.  

Evidently, his approval showed on his face, and Rose laughed.  “Do you like it?” 

He nodded and tucked in properly, not even noticing Rose preening a bit at her success.  She doubted that Mr. Smith had very many homemade meals, and she was strangely pleased to provide one to him.  She realized that she quite liked seeing him happy. It was refreshing, in a way.

“So, you were stressed about the library opening?”  She tried to coax him into conversation again without mentioning his brother.

“More like the book reading,” he said, “I don’t want- that is to say, I’d like the focus to still be on the library and not  _ Harold Saxon’s  _ new book.”

Rose nodded.  “Well, if it makes you feel any better, I’m pretty sure the benefactors will have all eyes on you and the company, as well.  Mr. Saxon is mostly just an attraction.”

“He’s quite fond of you.”

She worried her bottom lip. “Well, we seem to share something in common.”

“Are you still going to meet with him?”

“Most likely.  Does that upset you?”

“A bit.  Does  _ that  _ upset you?”

She pursed her lips, picking up on the game he was playing at.  Mr. Smith was not a man used to showing his feelings, and she knew she would be the person to open up between the two of them.  “No,” she responded finally, “Not really.”

He nodded, more so to himself than her, and it had her mind racing. Of course she would meet with Mr. Saxon, he was the one who had been trapped with her, after all.  She’d always had a sort of fairytale painted in her head that she would marry the boy who had been there, and that fantasy was drawn by her as a young child, making the young boy pinky swear that he would marry her when they were old enough. It was a ridiculous notion, but she found that the idea of marrying Mr. Saxon was even more ridiculous.  She felt no draw to him in any way, and it disappointed her a little. Her fairytale seemed to have fallen apart, but at least she would have answers. That was the most important thing, after all. She’d finally get to put her mind to ease, and maybe the nightmares would stop.

“Is that why you came over here?” She asked, “To talk to me about the opening?  You could’ve called.”

“I- I needed to see you.”

“Why?” She wasn’t sure why she was pressing him, it just suddenly seemed vastly important that she know why.  

To her surprise, he blushed a little, and looked away from her. “Miss Tyler, you give me comfort with your mere presence that my mother didn’t even give me when I was a child.”

She smiled a little, flattered and somewhat in awe of such a confession from him. ”Well, thank you, Mr. Smith, I’m happy that I could inspire such confidence in you.  Would you like some tea?”

He would, he decided, and nodded happily.  She set about fixing it once they were done eating, and he showed himself around her flat.  It was even tinier than he had initially thought, and she was just absolutely incredible at space management.  Every nook and shelf had something that belonged on it, whether it was books or knick knacks, or, surprisingly, some of her files from work.  ‘Mr. Smith’ was written in neat handwriting on plenty of the binders and boxes in her bedroom. It gave him an odd sort of satisfaction, and it pleased him even more that she was comfortable enough to allow him to look around like this.  

She came into the room- or rather, walked the few feet from the kitchen to her bedroom, to watch his perusal.  “It’s on,” she said, jerking her thumb over her shoulder to indicate the kettle.

He turned to face her, his eyes locking on hers.  Suddenly, he found that he couldn’t quite look away.  Had her eyes always caught light, just like that? He swallowed hard and reached out to cup her cheek.  Rose blinked in surprise but allowed the action, studying him with wide eyes. 

John couldn’t make himself move any closer, couldn’t bear to hear her words of rejection again. That, and niggling memories kept him from getting too close, for fear of flashbacks pushing him away from her.  Instead, he wrapped his arms around her shoulders, drawing her into a hug. Frowning, Rose hugged him back, confused by his sudden gesture, but not all unwilling. It was… Nice, actually.

After a few moments, she tried to pull away, but he just gripped her tighter, resting his cheek on her head. “Let’s stay like this for a minute,” he said softly, as though he was afraid for her to hear it. 

She smiled a little and nodded against his chest. “Okay.”

They’d never been this close for so long, but nothing about it felt awkward, much to Rose’s surprise.  She thought she might be uncomfortable with such close contact with her boss, but she supposed with the amount of times she’d adjusted his clothes and hair, this should not have been too terribly surprising.  It felt like a bit more than that, though. It was something powerful, something that was beginning to seep through her veins in a way that she was afraid to even begin to address. He was changing, becoming a better man, and she could feel it.  His heart was more tender, his thoughts less of himself (though still quite often of himself) and he shared parts of himself with her that she had a sneaking suspicion he did not share with other people.

He trusted her, and that thought warmed her more than anything else he had said thus far.

“From now on,” he whispered into her hair, “I’m going to be fiercely in love with you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> did I really write a page long hug? It appears so. I hope you enjoyed this chapter!


	14. Chapter 14

Rose was frozen in time for what felt like hours.  Had he just said that? Really? Or had she pictured it in her head?  And  _ why  _ would she picture him saying such a thing, if he hadn’t actually said it?  Her mind was whirring so hard that she almost felt like she was going to fall apart just from thinking too hard.

Suddenly, though, before she could reclaim her brain enough to say anything, Mr. Smith pushed away from her, his eyes wide with panic.  “I- I remember seeing it, that phrase, you know, in one of those silly romance novels you read. I just- it came into my head, I-”

Relief and an odd sort of mourning coursed through her, and she breathed out a breath., “Well!  What an excellent memory you have, Mr. Smith, I certainly had forgotten all about that line.” She didn’t think that that line had ever been in any book that she’d ever read, but her mind was still feeling quite hazy.

“I should go.”

“Oh… Alright. Yeah.”

He looked conflicted, like he wanted to say something, but never did.  He simply nodded, as if to himself, and then let her lead him towards the door.  She opened the door for him and nodded to him as he exited.

“I’ll see you tomorrow,” she said, “Please try to get some rest and stop worrying about the library opening.”

He smiled a little.  “I- Thank you. For tonight.  I know you didn’t have to do this for me.  I appreciate it very much. This is the first time I’ve eaten food that you’ve made, as well.”

“It’s just macaroni,” she laughed a little.

“You still made it,” he responded.  “Thank you.”

“Well, you’re welcome, then.”

They smiled at each other, a sort of goofy smile, but it made her heart feel warm in a way she didn’t really want to talk or think about.

He left then, and she watched from the door, watching him get into his car and look back at her numerous times before driving off down the road.  She turned back to see the two bowls on the table and felt that warmth light her chest again. It had been a very long time since she’d shared a meal with a man and actually enjoyed the whole time.  Mr. Smith had been a pleasant dinner companion, and after what he’d said… She felt her feelings for him shift quite drastically, and suddenly, watching him drive away from her little flat was… Difficult.  This was the first time he’d been in her house, she’d cooked for him. It had been… Fun. She smiled a little. She wasn’t sure if she’d  _ ever  _ had fun with Mr. Smith before.

“Oh no,” she whispered, picking up the bowls and setting them in the sink. “Oh,  _ no.” _

It wasn’t anything she could deal with now.  She was leaving the company, and she didn’t want to start anything that she couldn’t finish.  A relationship with Mr. Smith would be just that sort of thing. An ‘oh, thanks, I do quite fancy you now, but I’m leaving within the month!’  She almost shuddered at the awkwardness of even thinking about it. Besides, after all the rejecting she’d done to him, it would be almost rude to confess to him now. 

“Rose Tyler, you are absolutely in for it,” She whispered to herself.  There was no way she’d be getting any sleep tonight. 

*****

A knock at his door made Jack actually have to meditate for a moment.  He knew exactly who it was, of course. There was no one else that would come over this late, except for his  _ psychotic  _ friend.  

Resolving himself to his fate, he got out of bed and put his robe on quite aggressively before stalking to the door.  He threw his door open. “What, John?”

“What does it mean when a woman cooks for you?”

Jack blinked. “Oh?  Care to elaborate?”

John cleared his throat and shoved his hands into his pockets.  “Yes. I went to see Miss Tyler-”

“-Which I told you not to do.”

“Yes, well I went anyway, and she made food for me and we ate together.”

Jack blinked.  “So you just showed up at Rose Tyler’s flat, completely uninvited, freaking out about the library.  And you’re telling me she  _ fed  _ you?”

John nodded, his eyes wide. “Does it mean something, when a woman does something like that?”  
“Do you want to come in and talk about it?”

John brushed past Jack and walked right to his living room, sitting down on his couch and looking at him expectantly.  Jack huffed out a sigh and slammed the front door and walked back to join his friend. “Alright,” he said, sitting down across from him.  “Look. If a woman makes you dinner, that usually means something. If she’s your secretary, not so much.”

John deflated.

“But… She’s quitting.  She has no reason to be nice to you, not really.  And I’m not convinced that she’s the kind of person to be nice for no reason.  She could’ve just kicked you out. She  _ should have  _ just kicked you out.  But she didn’t. Why do you think that is?”

“Do you think she… Now… Returns my feelings?”

“She might.  Are you going to do anything about it?”  
John looked down at his hands, which basically gave Jack the answer that he was looking for.  He sighed, running his hands through his hair. 

“John.  Buddy. I don’t like to tell you what to do.  I’m not allowed to tell you what to do, actually.  But this girl is ripping you apart and she’s not even doing anything.  Which means you’re really gone for her. I really think you should say something, for your mental health and for my sleep schedule.”

“I don’t know how,” he admitted softly.

“Oh, pal, we’re in for a long night, aren’t we?”

*********

The next morning, Rose felt like she was moving in slow motion.  She had yet to convince herself that last night wasn’t some sort of odd fever dream in which she’d been crushing on her boss.  But no, he’d come to her flat and she’d cooked for him, and then he’d held her impossibly close and whispered about loving her.  Did he mean any of it? Or was it all part of the ploy to get her to marry him? The fact that he hadn’t tried to seduce her after the fact told her that maybe he was serious, and that was almost scarier than the thought that he was trying to play her.  Thinking about it was exhausting.

Just as she was starting to shake him from her mind, she heard her phone ringing from across the flat.  She checked it to see the object of her thoughts calling her. She blew out her cheeks. She wasn’t late, so why could he be calling her?  She answered, a little reluctantly.

“Good morning, Mr. Smith.”

“Good morning, Miss Tyler.  Please come out of your flat, I don’t want us to be late.”

She furrowed her brows. “Excuse me?”

“Just ready yourself for the day and come out.”

He hung up on her, leaving her sputtering at her phone.  After hurriedly getting the rest of her things together for the work day, she opened the door to see Mr. Smith parked exactly where he had been the night before, leaning back against his car, arms crossed. Rose swallowed hard.  Looking at him in the sun now, was something that she wasn’t quite ready for. He looked handsome, more handsome than he had a right to look after the amount he was stressing her out.

“Wh-why are you here?” Rose asked, shutting the door to her flat behind her.

He looked at her like she’d grown a second head. “Well, Miss Tyler, we both have to go to work, and I owe you for your kindness to me yesterday.”

“Oh, that… That was nothing.”  She turned around and locked the door, feeling his eyes digging into her back the whole time she did it.  She swallowed hard and turned around to face him again, coming down the three steps from her door. She was so nervous, though, and her brain so scrambled, that she tripped a little as she was about to reach the car.

She was surprised to feel his arms come around her waist, catching her against him. She wanted to pull back, but something about him holding her felt right in a strange way.  She looked up into his eyes and swallowed hard, surprised at the amount of gentleness that was in his gaze. She stepped out of his arms and smiled, making to walk to the driver’s side before he stopped her. 

“I’m driving today,” he said, ushering her towards the passenger side of the car. 

She didn’t have any time to respond before they were both situated in the car and suddenly he was staring at her again.  

“What?” She asked finally, furrowing her brows at him.

“I- you look lovely today.”

“Oh, well, thanks.”

***

She thought it would be more awkward, but they actually chatted on the way to the office.  And suddenly, Mr. Smith seemed way more interested in her well being and what she would be doing all day.  She explained to him that she had plenty of work to do still, especially with training Lynda. To her surprise, his good mood didn’t dampen when she mentioned her replacement.  Maybe all of his strange behavior wasn’t about her leaving after all. 

Later on, she got a papercut showing him the reports from the past week, and Mr. Smith made a huge show of cleaning the cut and bandaging her up. His hands were gentle, almost caressing, and he gave her so much attention that by the end of the day, she was sitting at her desk, staring into space, wondering if she should say something to him about the whole thing.  Should she confess? Would he even understand it? He seemed like he might be having real feelings for her, but the man was so confusing that she was afraid to even bring it up.

About an hour before she was set to clock out, and Lynda and most everyone else had left for the day, Harold Saxon approached her desk.  She got to her feet when she saw him, smiling brightly.

“Hello, Mr. Saxon.  Are you here to see Mr. Smith?”

“No, actually,” Mr. Saxon said, offering her a smile. “I’m here to see you.  I was wondering if you were free for dinner tonight. I’d like to start connecting the dots on our… Past.”

Rose suddenly felt confused.  She’d waited years to get answers on her kidnapping, on that horrible, horrible day.  But since Mr. Smith had come to her flat last night, she hadn’t even thought about meeting up with Mr. Saxon.  Part of her felt a little guilty for it, and she wasn’t sure if she would have even followed up with Mr. Saxon after everything that happened, but she sort of owed him now.  

“Sure, I can do that.  I just have to finish up here.”

“Understandable, I can wait.”

She smiled and nodded. “Thanks.  It shouldn’t take long, Mr. Smith usually doesn’t actually stay in the office too late.”

“Oh.  Well, actually, it’s probably better if he doesn’t know that I’m here.  I know you’ve noticed we don’t exactly get along. I’ll wait for you in the lobby.”

“Alright,” She agreed, and as he left she found her eyes drawn back to the heavy doors of Mr. Smith’s office.  Something felt wrong. She wished she could put her finger on what.


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter moves kinda fast because THE BURN WAS GETTING TOO SLOW FOR ME OKAY I'M LOSING IT
> 
> Hope you enjoy!
> 
> I'll be out of town the next 3 weeks so I won't be able to update... I hope you all understand and I hope this chapter makes up for it!

Rose met Mr. Saxon in the lobby once she’d seen Mr. Smith off.  He’d seemed reluctant to leave her, and Rose had almost asked him to dinner instead of going to see Mr. Saxon.  Still, she shook herself. She’d made a commitment and she was going to follow through on it. 

Mr. Saxon suggested a restaurant and they met there, but Rose wasn’t sure if there was something else that she should be thinking about.  Part of her wanted to go back and see what Mr. Smith was up to, but part of her was also concerned about her sudden attachment today. Not that she hadn’t always found him attractive, she wasn’t blind, but the way he’d been caring about her in recent days made her think of him in a very different way.  

“You seem distracted,” Mr. Saxon told her suddenly.

She looked up at him across the table. She’d almost forgotten where she was. “Oh. No, I just- preparing for the library opening, it’s a lot of work,” she lied easily.  “I don’t mean for my mind to wander.”

“My brother is a slave driver,” Mr. Saxon tsked.  ‘He works you far too hard.”

“I’d rather not talk about him right now,” Rose said, forcing a smile.  “You wanted to talk about the day we were kidnapped.”

Mr. Saxon sighed deeply.  “Yes. I- I’ve been looking for you for awhile, Miss Tyler. I never thought I’d actually meet you.”

He remembered everything. He told her the story the way she knew it, except for one factor.  When they left the house, they’d crawled on the floor, and the boy she’d been with told her that there was a big, scary spider and she should watch her hands as they crawled.  Mr. Saxon didn’t seem to remember it that way. He remembered them walking out, hand in hand. Something itched at the back of Rose’s mind. Had  _ she  _ remembered that wrong? There couldn’t have been a spider, at least not one big enough that she wouldn't be allowed to look up.  She chewed her bottom lip and was lost for the rest of the dinner.

“Could I get your phone number?” Mr. Saxon asked at the end of the night, when they left the restaurant.

“Oh… I’m sure we’ll see each other,” she replied, smiling brightly, and was glad when he didn’t press it any further.

*********

The day of the library opening finally came, and Mr. Smith and Miss Tyler were both incredibly busy.  Rose didn’t see much of Mr. Smith, as he was in meetings and she was running around trying to throw everything together last minute. Lynda was tagging along with her, struggling to keep up with her senior. 

“Wow, you sure do a lot of running around on the job!” Lynda panted.

“Sorry, don’t mean to drag you,” Rose laughed. “I’m just in a bit of rhythm with it, I guess.  It gets easier with practice.”

“Ooh, I hope so.”

Mr. Saxon was present for many of the meetings as well, since he was a guest of honor, which Mr. Smith was  _ not  _ happy about.

“Really, Miss Tyler, I don’t like you spending time with him, and he’ll just follow you around,” he’d said, or grumbled, really.  

She raised her eyebrows.  “He’ll have his own work to do, Mr. Smith.  I’m not terribly concerned about what Mr. Saxon does.”

He stared at her across his desk.  “Miss Tyler.”

She frowned at him. “What?”

“I think it’s in your best interest to stay away from him. I’m not trying to be unreasonable.”

“You’re scaring me a bit, Mr. Smith.  You just-” she flailed her hands a bit, getting annoyed.  “You shake me up.”

He leaned towards her and smiled a little.  “Maybe I want to shake you up.”

Then they had stared at each other until Lynda had come in the room to ask Rose when they were going to head over to the library. They’d jumped apart and Rose had practically ran out the door.  

She shook herself now, thinking about it.  Her feelings for him were growing stronger and she wasn’t sure what to do about it.  Maybe she could say something once she quit. Maybe she  _ should  _ say something. He definitely seemed to have an interest in her that stretched beyond having her as an employee.  She swallowed hard, and turned to Lynda. “We have about an hour before the benefactors and guests start arriving.  Can you finish setting up the lobby?”

“Sure!” Lynda jumped at the chance to work on something alone, and Rose was relieved to have some time alone.  She wasn’t alone for long, though.

“Have you finished in here?” Mr. Smith asked, entering the main library with her. 

Rose jumped and spun around.  “Mr. Smith! Are you done with your meetings?”

He nodded, shoving his hands into his pockets.  “Yes, I’ve wrapped up everything. We’re ready to open.” 

“Congratulations, then.”

“Congratulations are in order for you too, Miss Tyler.  You’ve worked hard, and I appreciate it very much.” He smiled softly at her. “And I’ll be sorry to see you go.”

She smiled. “I’ve enjoyed working for you, Mr. Smith.”

“Your work isn’t what I’ll miss.”  He stepped closer to her and raised his hand to cup her cheek gently.  His fingers were shaking a little against her skin. 

“Then… Then what will you miss?”  She asked softly, making a point of looking up into his eyes.  They were softer than she’d seen them look, like the night he’d come to her flat and she’d cooked for them.  She could pretend that they were normal. That he just  _ liked  _ her, and that it wasn’t any more complicated than that.  But she knew it was complicated, that it was something that could fall apart so easily, and it hadn’t even been put together yet.

“Your spirit,” he said softly.  “Your smile.” He stroked his thumb over her cheekbone.  “I- Miss Tyler, I-”

The door burst open and Mr. Smith stumbled away from her, shoving his hands into his pockets once more.  “Mr. Harkness!” he said far too loudly. “What are you _doing_ here?”  
“Your brother’s reading is starting in about an hour, should we prep him now?”  Jack had a smug look on his face that made Rose’s burn red. 

“Yes.  Please do.  I want him out of here as soon as possible,” Mr. Smith said firmly. “Thank you.”  
Jack looked between the two of them, and the smug look didn’t leave.  

“I should get going too,” Rose said, “I have to help the stage get set up.”

Mr. Smith looked a  little conflicted, lie he wanted to say something else and wasn’t sure how to bring it up with Jack in the room, or he’d lost the courage all together.  She watched him open and close his a few times. 

“Fine,” he nodded. “I’ll see you at the opening ceremonies, then.”

“Okay.” She left the room, feeling his eyes on her the entire time.  What had she been  _ thinking?  _

****

The opening, very luckily, went very smoothly.  Mr. Smith spoke to the benefactors and the attendees and they were clearly very invested in his whole speech.  Rose found herself just as intrigued by his words. He was really charismatic and she was finding herself falling for him a little more with every smile that was even remotely in her direction.

She stayed by Mr. Smith until Mr. Saxon’s reading began.  There was much excited chattering from the audience as everyone settled into the chairs that all faced the small stage.  Mr. Smith looked around nervously, fingers laced together and hands in his lap. Rose could practically feel the nervousness radiating off of him in waves, and when Mr. Saxon got up on the stage, the fidgeting next to her got worse. 

“Hello, everyone,” Mr. Saxon smiled out at the crowd, but mostly at Rose.  “I feel very lucky to be invited to this opening. My brother, John Smith, has done some amazing work here, and I’m very pleased to be sharing some of my new book with you.”  He spoke with the confidence of a man who knew he was loved and knew that the audience would enjoy that he was putting out. “And, there is someone very special here in the audience tonight, Miss Rose Tyler, who, I daresay has saved my life.”  
Rose smiled tightly, trying to enjoy the attention, but Mr. Smith got up and left the center, and Rose got the inexplicable urge to follow him.  She turned over her shoulder and watched him leave, almost storming out. She waited until Mr. Saxon began reading, but then got up to follow Mr. Smith out.

Night had fallen by now, and the only sound outside was the click of Rose’s heels on the pavement as she followed Mr. Smith.  He stopped outside of the center when he heard her following and turned around to face her. They watched each other for a moment and Rose laced her fingers together in front of her, feeling nervousness rush through her veins.

“What is it you came out here to tell me, then?” He asked softly, hands once again in his pockets.  

“It’s a misunderstanding,” she said quickly, before she could rethink it. 

“What is?”

“What you think you heard, what you think your brother said about me.  It’s a misunderstanding. We’re not- I’m not- I’m not interested in Mr. Saxon.”

He shook his head. “You don’t have to explain yourself. I have no right to ask that of you.”

“No, I want to tell you. To explain it. We’re dancing around everything and I want to make it clear.”

“Why are you saying this?” He asked, and she could practically feel his heart breaking.  He cared for her. She was suddenly sure of it.

“Because I don’t want stupid misunderstandings between us anymore, ‘cause you’re really great at making assumptions really quickly, so I don’t want those misunderstandings to happen, even if they seem insignificant.”  She bit her lip, stopping herself.

“Why?”  His dark eyes studied her with an earnestness that was mixed with fear.

“Because I like you,” She said bluntly, “Because over the past few weeks, you have really changed.  You’re kind and thoughtful and I wish I’d known this side of you sooner. I care about you a lot. And I’m sorry it took me so long, because you’ve said things about marrying me that I think you may have meant.  So. I like you. Not your brother. You.” She felt like she was going to faint, like she was a school girl again, telling a boy she had a crush on him. It wasn’t like that, but she wasn’t sure how else to describe it to him.

He was staring at her, expressive eyebrows lifted, and she felt her sureness of herself diminish.  She felt her heart drop and she nodded to herself, trying to turn away from him. She felt his hand close around her wrist and he pulled her back towards him, wrapping his arms around her.  

Not sure whether to be relieved or confused, she hugged him back, hands linked behind his waist.   They stood like that for a long moment, wrapped around each other right by the street. He pulled back and cupped her cheek with his hand, mirroring what he’d done in the library earlier.  She was struck again with how beautiful he was, his hair tousled in a way that was obviously deliberate and somehow professional. His eyes were even darker than she’d seen them earlier, closing in on her.  He leaned down towards her, and she felt her eyes flutter shut, waiting.

He tensed though, gasping and pulling farther back, but not all the way out of her space. Her eyes flew open and she saw fear coloring his eyes and recognized that he was having some sort of flashback.  Her heart absolutely dissolved then and there. She couldn’t pretend to understand what he was reliving, but she knew that she was going to have to be the one to take that step. She reached up and took his face in her hands slowly, watching him to see if he was still alright with this.  He followed her movements without complaint, and she kissed him, feeling warmth bloom in her chest as she felt him respond back. He pulled away only to return with a stronger kiss, pushing one hand up into her hair and wrapping his other arm around her waist.

Rose was sure that she’d never been kissed like this before, and she slid her arms all the way around his neck, opening her mouth to let him deepen the kiss even further.  He stopped trembling and his grip grew sure, making the heat in her chest get even hotter. 

Finally, they pulled apart, still nose to nose, and Mr. Smith gave her one more kiss before backing away completely.

“I- So you… You don’t like my brother?”

She laughed and was relieved to see a similar,  _ brilliant  _ smile light his face as he wrapped his arms around her and held her close against him. 

There had to be something here that could become something.  There  _ had  _ to be.  His touch felt too good to be anything but right.


	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm back! i was in Seoul for 3 and a half weeks, it was amazing, and now I'm back and ready to shower you all in fluff!!!!
> 
>  
> 
> Enjoy!

“We should go for a walk,” John said, pulling away from Rose.  His eyes were earnest looking into hers, like he was afraid if they went back inside, Saxon would sweep her off her feet and she’d forget all about what had just happened.

“Okay,” She agreed, her head still spinning a little. Things had shifted so fast, and she wasn’t sure where to go from here.  She wanted to tell him so many things, to make him feel sure that she was being genuine. But she knew simply from being his secretary that there were women who used him, who promised him they had feelings for him but were really only after the company. He acted like it never bothered him, and swore to God that he hadn’t actually had feelings for them, but of course he had.  He wasn’t immune. She knew that now.  

He still didn’t let go of her, even though he’d been the one to suggest going for a walk.  But the shield hadn’t closed back over his eyes. He was still looking at her like she’d hung the stars.  No one had  _ ever  _ looked at her like that before. 

“You wanted to walk?” She asked.  He nodded, and stood up a little straighter.  He released his grip on her waist and then reached down cautiously to take her hand.  She beamed up at him and laced their fingers together, relieved when an answering smile graced his lips.  She’d expected that some sort of awkwardness would settle between them, but she supposed that after knowing each other for nine years, such a shift wasn’t quite as uncomfortable.

They left the library, walking into the town that was nearby.  Rose kept her grip on his hand and led them a bit, keeping herself in front.  They were quiet for a few moments, when finally John shoved his free hand into his pocket and spoke.

“You know, I think I owe you an apology.”

She frowned and looked up at him. “What?”

“Yes, I mean- I’ve taken you for granted for a very long time, and that was very wrong of me.  It’s not that I can’t live without you, but I certainly wouldn’t want to.” He looked at her, and the seriousness in his expression shocked her. “I realized I wasn’t treating you the way I should be.”

“And by realized, do you mean Jack told you?”

He wrinkled his nose. “I’d rather not talk about Jack if it’s all the same to you.’  
She laughed.  “Alright, then.”

“So we… This… We’re not playing games anymore, are we?  We’re-” He sniffed and shook off the insecurities that were beginning to show. “You and I- we’re a couple now, aren’t we?”

Rose thought about it for a moment, and nodded. “I suppose we are.  I don’t want to date anybody else.”

“I don’t want to date anybody else either.”

“Okay, then,” she said, as though it was all settled.  “Then yes, we’re a couple now.”

She saw his shoulders deflate in absolute relief and felt her heart swell a little.  This man, this incredible, powerful man, was nervous of her rejection. It made her feel a little like she had power of her own, enough to make someone feel like she was worth something.  She had so many questions for him, she wanted to ask him why he’d done so many of the things he had, but she was sure that now wasn’t the time. In the past few minutes, he’d opened up to her in a way that he never had before.  Allowing himself to be vulnerable was incredibly unlike him, and she’d only seen it a handful of times. Seeing it now, and seeing that he was being vulnerable on purpose, with her, was something that made her feel an emotion she wished she could put a finger on.  

“Should I.. I should walk you home.  There’s nothing happening at the opening once my brother’s finished, and I don’t know if I should show my face back there after storming out. That was highly unprofessional of me.”

“You had a good reason,” she replied softly.

“Yes, I did, but it will be very difficult to explain in a way that doesn’t make me sound like a lunatic to my benefactors.”  He shook himself. “Not that I would do anything to- Not that I would lie about what’s happened here. I wouldn’t. I won’t.”

She smiled a little.  “Yeah, well, we can’t exactly talk about it to the company, can we?”

“No, I suppose not, but that doesn’t mean I’ll deny it if anyone asks.”

They walked to her flat, which luckily, wasn’t too terribly far, and Rose was surprised, pleasantly surprised at how easily conversation was coming to them now that neither of them were dancing around things that they should or shouldn’t say.  It made Rose finally feel like something was undeniably right about her life.

She was still quitting, she couldn’t stay at the company, but now she knew she’d still be seeing John, and that somehow made leaving a million times easier.  

She took a step up one of the stairs to her flat and looked down at him, smiling when he was still holding her hand. 

“I should… Reiterate that I’m an incredibly eligible bachelor, and that marrying me would probably be a good economic move for you as well as socially.”

Rose nodded seriously.  “This question again?”

“I mean it.  I thought I just wanted you to marry me to stay at the company, but I realize I wanted you to stay because I was afraid of what my life would be like if you left.”

“As your secretary?”

“No.”

She beamed at him, and the thousand watt grin he gave her in return almost made her heart explode.  She leaned down from the step and wrapped her arms around his neck, hugging him tight now that she was allowed to do so.  He laughed and hugged her back, hands locked behind her waist. His grip on her was reassuring and unlike times other men had hugged her.  It felt almost reverent.  

“I’m sorry if I spoiled the library opening for you,” Rose said softly.

“I see this as the best possible outcome.”  
She laughed, pulling back a little to look him in the face.  After a moment, she pulled her hand from behind his neck and cupped his cheek.  Emboldened by her movement, he leaned up and kissed her, and the fact that he initiated it made heat bloom in her chest.  He held her a little tighter, pulling her down from the stop so he could kiss her harder. Being kissed by him, with such a single-mindedness, made her mind go a little numb.

After several moments, he pulled back.  “I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“You could come in.”  Who said that? Surely it wasn’t Rose.

He beamed at her and nudged her nose with his.  “I’ll see you tomorrow. It’s not that I don’t want to, you know.”

She smiled and took a step back, feeling a little embarrassed. “Right.  I’ll see you tomorrow.”

He was still smiling at her, but he turned from her and started heading back up the street, presumably back to his car, which was still at the library.  Rose laced her fingers together in front of her and watched him go, feeling completely content. Once he was out of sight, she went inside, having to stop herself from running down the sidewalk after him.

She went inside, sighing to herself as she tossed her keys onto the table.  She was just taking off her shoes when she heard a knock at the door.  

Furrowing her brows, she went back and pulled the door open.  John was standing there, his hands in his pockets. Her lips twitched and she fought the smile.  

“Have you forgotten something?”

“No, I just… Was thinking that you might be a bit lonely without me all night, so I’d give you another hug.”  He was well trained, and she almost would’ve believed that it was for her benefit, but she smiled softly and nodded.

 “I think that might be a good idea,” she said, “You know, if you really think I need it.”

It was a surprise to her that John really liked hugging, but her heart melted a little when she suddenly had the thought that he probably didn’t have much human contact.  His family wasn’t exactly affectionate, and he didn’t really have many friends. Even when he’d dated while she was working for him, he’d never really initiated physical contact.  So the fact that he was initiating it with her was something that she would carry close to her heart. It was a trust that she wasn’t sure she deserved, but it made her heart warm to have it.

“Thank you,” She said when he pulled away.  “You should get some rest though, you have a meeting in the morning.”

“Yes, right,” He nodded to her and stepped back.  “I’ll see you tomorrow then.”

She grinned. “See you tomorrow.” 

******** 

John didn’t let anyone know that he was leaving.  He just picked up his car and left. The festivities were over, and there wasn’t anyone he wanted to see or talk to anyway.  On his drive home, he let his thoughts take over, thoughts about his past that he hadn’t let himself think about in what felt like a thousand years.

_ “I’ll walk you home.” _

_ Two young children, who had just freed themselves from a disgusting situation, walked down the street.  Besides being a little dirty, they were really no worse for wear. And the little girl didn’t even know the worst of what they had been through.   _

_ “Okay!  I’m right this way!”  The little girl skipped ahead of him, but then came back to hold his hand. “My mum is gonna be worried, probably.” _

_ “Mine too.” _

_ “You don’t have to walk me, though.  I can do it myself.” _

_ This little girl was one hundred percent headstrong, and though a very young John Smith knew she could probably walk home by herself, he really didn’t want her to have to.  He gripped her hand a little tighter. _

_ “That’s okay. I don’t mind.” _

_ She chatted as they walked, but John was still a little frightened, and looked over his shoulder every few steps as they went on their way.  Finally, they approached a run down building of flats. _

_ “This is me!” Rose Tyler chirped happily.  She hopped up on the step and looked at him, now at his eye level with her new, added height.  “Thanks for walking me home. Promise you’ll come visit me?” _

_ He smiled.  “Okay.” _

_ “No, you have to promise.”  She held out her pinky. “Promise me we’ll see each other again.” _

_ He sighed, feeling a little childish, but linked his pinky with hers and touched their thumbs together, a promise to meet again.  “I promise.” _

_ She grinned at him, a grin so bright and full of joy that John wondered if it was possible for someone to be so happy after such an event.   _

_ “I’m also gonna marry you,” Rose said bluntly, dropping his hand. _

_ “No, you won’t,” John said, “You’ll find someone much better to marry.” _

_ She shook her head. “There isn’t anyone better.” _

_ He rolled his eyes at her.  “Yeah, there is. But I’ll still come to see you anyway.  Maybe I’ll come to your wedding too.” _

_ “You have to come!  You’re the groom!” She laughed, shaking her head at him.  “Thank you for walking home with me.” _

_ “Yeah.” _

_ He watched her go up the stairs and knock on the door to what must have been her flat, and only left once her very relieved mother was doting over her and ushering her inside.  He knew his reception wouldn’t be quite as warm. _

_ ***** _

John smiled. It was a fond memory now, even if Rose would never remember it was him.  She had definitely blocked out parts of it, where he had not. Regardless, even with all his happiness, he didn’t sleep well that night.

Rose slept fitfully as well.  Her dreams were confusing: dreams of the kidnapping, as they often were, but instead of Saxon in the spot of the boy who was with her, it was John.  Her mind couldn’t place Mr. Saxon as the boy, and she woke up feeling more confused than ever.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please review?


	17. Chapter 17

The next morning, Rose found herself feeling like things should feel more different than they did.  She rolled over and picked up her phone, scrolling through her notifications. She caught the contact name “Mr. Smith” on her phone and felt her eyebrows raise.  She clicked on the message and read the text. 

_ Good morning.  I hope you slept well. -JS _

They didn’t often communicate through text, as she had always thought it was too intimate to do so with her boss, but since things had shifted between them, he must have realized or decided that it was alright to do so.  

She bit her lip, smiling a little at her phone.  He could be a bit romantic when he wanted to be, it seemed. 

_ I did.  I hope you did too. _

She sent the text and got out of bed quickly, before she could force herself to dwell on the text.  She got ready with a little more pep in her step. A worry nagged at the back of her mind, forcing her to think about the fact that things might be slightly awkward at work.  She sincerely hoped that they wouldn’t be. After knowing Mr. Smith for nine years, she hoped that their relationship would remain a little consistent, even with the new changes.  Though, him treating her like a girlfriend instead of a secretary would be very nice indeed. 

But then again, what if he didn’t want to be exclusive? What if he just wanted to mess around?  She wasn’t sure she could do that. Rsoe had always committed with her whole heart when it came to relationships, which was part of her problem.  Then again, he’d never been casual with any other women that he’d been involved with.  

She shook her head at herself in the mirror.  She was being ridiculous, thinking about it this hard was not helpful in any way.  She’d see him at work and then she’d see how, exactly, he was planning to go about this.  She finished applying her makeup, pulled her hair up in a half-updo style, and walked out the door.

***

Upon arriving, she found Martha and Lynda staring at her from the employee lounge. She stopped in her tracks and stared back at them. 

“Yeah?”

“What happened at the library opening?” Martha asked.

Rose blinked.  Until she was officially no longer working for Mr. Smith, she couldn’t say anything about the way their relationship had changed.  It wouldn’t be appropriate and it could definitely get the both of them in trouble. 

“Nothing, why?” She said, crossing her arms over her chest. 

“I just saw Mr. Smith walk in here, and he looked very happy.  He smiled at the both of us on his way in.” Martha looked to Lynda and then Rose.  

“Um, maybe he’s just in a good mood?  I don’t know.” Rose felt her heart rate start to pick up a bit.  “I’ll talk to him and make sure he’s okay, I guess.”

“I’ve just never seen him smile like that,” Lynda laughed, “Not that I’ve been here long, but still.”

Rose forced a laugh. “Yeah, that is a bit unusual.”  She beamed at them. “Have a good morning.”

       She hurried to her desk, either to see Mr. Smith or to try to avoid him, she wasn’t sure which. She sat down and booted her computer up, careful not to look up. 

       “Good morning, Miss Tyler,” Jack Harkness said as he walked in front of her desk.  Rose lifted her head to address him. She knew that Jack was a very good friend of Mr. Smith, but he hardly ever came into the office.  

“Good morning, Mr. Harkness,” she said, “What brings you here today?”

“Your dear boss.  Is he in?”

“I just got here myself, but some of the other girls in the office said that they saw him.”

“Ah!  May I let myself in?”

“Be my guest.”

He entered the office but came out about a minute later, giggling.  Before Rose could even ask what he was laughing about, he told her; “He’s sleeping on the couch in there.”

Rose blinked. “What?  Mr. Smith never sleeps at work.”

“Well, he is today.  Come look.”

Intrigued, Rose got up and followed Mr. Harkness into the office.  Sure enough, John Smith was lying curled up on his side on the couch, one hand curled under his cheek as a pillow.  She smiled fondly at him, unable to hold it back.

“He must not have slept well last night,” She said.  

“I guess not,” Mr. Harkness said, laughing.  “I’ll come back a little later, then. I’ll be in the office all day, so have him ring me when he’s awake.”

Rose nodded, smiling pleasantly.  “Yeah, I’ll tell him.” She watched Mr. Harkness as he headed towards the door, but turned around at the last moment.

“Take care of him, will you? He trusts you with everything.”

And with that cryptic remark, Mr. Harkness left the office, hands in his pockets.  Rose shook herself, trying not to think too hard about it. Turning back to Mr. Smith, she found herself smiling again.  He really did look peaceful, and he also looked quite young, with his features all smoothed out in sleep. She fetched a spare blanket that she knew he kept in his desk, understanding now why he had it.  This very well may have been a regular occurance- to nap at the office. She draped the blanket over him, from ankles to shoulders, and sat down in the space in front of his hips.  

Now that she knew she was allowed, it was difficult to keep from touching him, so she didn’t stop herself.  She reached to brush some of his fringe back from his forehead and smiled a little when he shifted towards her touch.

“You should really rest more,” she said softly, feeling her brows furrow in worry.  “You work too hard.”

“So do you,” he mumbled, and she jerked her hand back.  He whined in disappointment and pulled her hand back to his head without opening his eyes.  She bit her lip to keep her smile from splitting her face.

“M’sorry, I didn’t mean to wake you up.”

His eyes opened slowly and he looked up at her with a soft, unguarded gaze.  “It’s alright. I can always go back to sleep.” Suddenly, he sat up and wrapped his arms around her waist, tugging her shoulder into his chest.  The motion forced them almost nose to nose, and she felt her heart rate pick up. His eyes were dark, but up close she could see that they were lighter towards the inside.  

“I missed you,” he said softly.

“You just saw me last night.”  
He pouted a little at her. “What, so you didn’t miss me then?”

She laughed a little. “Sure I did.”

His gaze flickered down to her lips, but he deterred it back to her eyes quickly.  “I… I hope it’s alright, that I texted you this morning.”

“Of course it’s alright.  I thought we agreed that we were…”

“Exclusive.”  
“Well, yeah.”

“I’d like us to be.”  His voice was very serious and intentional, and it made her blood run a little warmer.

She gave him a closed lipped smile, feeling a little nervous all of a sudden.  “Okay,” She whispered.

“Yeah?”

“Yes.”

He grinned at her, a grin she  _ rarely  _ saw, where his eyes twinkled and she saw how beautiful joy could be on a beautiful face.  He leaned forward, brushing his nose against hers. She let her eyes flutter shug, leaning towards him a little. 

“May I kiss you?” He asked, suddenly timid.

“Yeah,” She said, having a difficult time holding back from rolling her eyes at him.  “Please.”

He leaned forward then, kissing her softly, arms still wrapped firmly around her waist.  She lifted a hand to cup his cheek, feeling his jaw moving underneath her palm. Kissing him really was pure bliss in a way she had never experienced with kissing someone before.  Boyfriends she’d had in the past had never really wanted to kiss before, almost found it to be a chore, but the fact that Mr. Smith wanted to shower her in such affection made her feel cherished in a way she never had before. 

After a few moments, he pulled back, pressing his forehead against hers.  “I’m sorry it took me so long to be honest with you.”

She pulled back from him, looking at him skeptically.  “How long have you had… Feelings for me, then?”

He tucked a strand of hair behind her ear, gazing at her fondly.  “Years.”  
She blushed and looked away. “You could go back to your nap, if you wanted. I didn’t mean to wake you up.”

“That’s alright,” he repeated.  “Would you like to go to lunch with me?”

“Yeah, I would.”

“As a date, not with you as my secretary.”  
“Okay, I’d like that.”

“Alright. I’ll-”

A knock at the door startled them both and Rose popped up off the couch. Mr. Smith groaned and lay back down on the couch.  “Whoever it is, can you tell them I’m asleep? I actually think I might need the rest.”  
“Of course, Mr. Smith.”

“When it’s just us, please call me John.”  
“Then you should call me Rose.”

“If you like.”  
His eyes were already slipping closed.  He really was tired.

She grinned and headed towards the doors to his office, pulling it open to see Donna outside, looking peeved at having to wait.  “You weren’t at your desk.”  
“No… Mr. Smith is sleeping, he didn’t get much rest at the opening last night.”

“I heard he ran out when you left.”

“Well… Yes.”

“What happened?”  
“Nothing!  We just talked about what we would need to be doing today, but I don’t think he rested well.”  That wasn’t necessarily a lie, she decided. 

Donna narrowed her eyes at her. “Right.  So, can I speak to him? I have some papers he needs to look at.”

“Sorry, Donna, no- he actually is sleeping.  I was in here because Mr. Harkness wanted to see him too.”

Donna didn’t seem to quite believe her, but Rose wasn’t sure it mattered.  People would make up anything, and she knew that. It would be better to just ignore it for now.  She looked at Rose for another moment. “You look to be well rested.”

“Well, yeah, I turned in early, like I always do.”  She slipped out of the office and shut the door behind her. “Look, I’ll go ahead and call you when he wakes up, you’ll be on the list right after Mr. Harkness, okay?  Where’s Lynda?”  
“In the employee lounge, she’ll be over soon.”

“Good, I have some new stuff I have to show her.”

Donna seemed to take all that at face value and left Rose standing outside the office, feeling nervous for absolutely no reason.  She wasn’t doing anything  _ wrong  _ after all.  Blowing out her cheeks, she headed back to her desk.  She did feel a little more awake than usual though, so maybe waking up and immediately kissing her bloke would be a good way to start out her days from now on.

She smiled a little to herself.  Her bloke. That was who he was. John Smith was her bloke.  It had been a long time since she let herself feel things like this, and she only hoped that she was placing her trust in the right person.  She’d known him so long, though, that she truly did trust him. She shook herself and booted up her computer. She was only working here for a little longer, it wouldn’t do to keep getting distracted until she left.

Then again, it was very hard to focus when one was going to be having lunch with one’s very fit bloke.


	18. Chapter 18

Rose felt what she thought were unnecessary nerves before meeting up with Mr. Smith for lunch.  She had plenty to show Lynda, and was surprised by how much of it she actually got through before the heavy doors to Mr. Smith’s office opened.  He had his jacket on and his eyes were locked on her from the moment he opened the door. 

“Miss Moss, I’m sure you have plenty to look over while Miss Tyler and I take our lunch,” he said, though he wasn’t even looking at her. 

“Um, yes, Mr. Smith, I do.”

“Good.  Miss Tyler?  Shall we?” He raised his eyebrows and Rose got up, leaving Lynda alone at the desk.  She seemed oblivious to the subtext of the scene happening before her. The both of them left the office and once they were outside the building, Mr. Smith reached his hand out for her.  

Rose looked up at him.  “Are you sure?”

He smiled at her, and it still surprised her how free he was being with those smiles.  “Yeah, I’m sure.”

She returned his grin and slid her hand into his, lacing their fingers together.  It was surprisingly comfortable, a natural movement to settle herself in with him.  Maybe they really were supposed to be together all along. She smiled a little to herself.  

“There’s a little cafe I’d like to take you too, we’ve never been there together before.”  
“Oh?” She looked back up to him.

“I usually go alone to get some work done, and think, but now I’d like to share it with you.”  He looked down at her nervously.  

Once inside the cafe, Rose found herself actually getting a little nervous.  She didn’t want to be awkward, or uncomfortable, and she didn’t want him to feel that way either.  She stood by the table and gestured for him to sit. 

“No, you should sit first.”  He was pretty firm in his tone. “I don’t want you to be here as my secretary,” he touched her cheek gently, “It’s different now.”

It was.  She nodded slightly and sat down, watching him carefully still.  He sat across from her and reached for her hand, wiggling his fingers slightly. She suppressed a smile.  He really seemed to be a fan of any tactile touch that he could get out of her. She slipped her hand into his and felt him relax a little as his grip on her tightened.

“Anything you want, I’m paying.”  
She arched an eyebrow. “You usually do.”

“Yes, well, it’s different this time,” he looked at her urgently, “It  _ is  _ different, isn’t it?”  

“Yeah, of course it is,” Rose said, reassuring him.  “Of course.”

Although there were awkward moments in the lunch, where Rose got up to help him and he had to urge her to sit back down.  He seemed almost urgent about it, and Rose realized he was now desperately trying to hang onto her as a girlfriend instead of his secretary.  It was somehow much more flattering than how he had been trying to get her before.  

After lunch, when they headed back to work, Rose found herself reaching for his hand first, which seemed to make him quite chuffed, and he puffed out his chest just a bit.  It was almost like having her first boyfriend again, the excitement of a new relationship, except they knew each other so much better. She didn’t have to ask herself too many questions about him, because she already knew everything- so she just had to ask him about new parts of the things she already knew about.  

Something still niggled at the back of her brain.  The whole business with Mr. Saxon made her think that she still needed to go ahead and have dinner with him, or at least meet with him to discuss their kidnapping.  When she brought it up to Mr. Smith that night in his office, he was less than impressed with the idea. 

“I thought you said you didn’t have feelings for him.”

“I don’t,” Rose said firmly, “I just need closure.  You can understand that, can’t you?”

He pouted a bit at her, and she found herself laughing, just a little.  She bit her lip and shook her head. “M’sorry, it’s not funny, really. I’ve just never seen you make that face.”

“If you have to go, can you at least understand why I’m jealous?  He  _ clearly  _ has it in his head that he’ll sweep you off your feet.”

“I’ve already been swept off my feet.”  
“That doesn’t count, I swept _you_ off your feet.”

“Well, yes.”  He rolled back from his desk.  “Come here?”

She sighed and approached him, standing on the same side as the desk as him.  She crossed her arms, and he took her wrist in his hand, tugging gently. She relented after a bit, letting him tug her to sit sideways in his lap.  She wrapped her arm around his shoulder, looking him in the eyes and daring him to tell her no.

“You say you’re jealous,” she said, “But does that mean you don’t trust me?”

He laid his arm over her thighs, the other wrapped around her waist.  “I trust you.” 

“Then you shouldn’t be worried about it,” She said simply.  “You and I both know what I want, so there shouldn’t be any trouble with me getting a bit of closure on the situation.  Really.”

“Would it be alright if I… Came over to your flat, after you meet with him?”

She realized he needed it.  That it wasn’t really about her, it was about his own insecurity.  It wasn’t that he didn’t trust her, he didn’t trust his brother. She felt sorry for him, in a way, but she also wanted him to know that he could trust her in any situation.  

“Okay,” She said, “That would be okay.”

She felt his muscles relax against her and he leaned his forehead against her temple.  She smiled a little, running her hand into the hair on the back of his neck. “You really don’t have to worry.  I’m not gonna do anything to betray you, or anything like that. I wouldn’t do that to you.”

“I know.”  He pulled back and leaned in to kiss her.  She accepted his kiss and tightened her arm around his neck.  His kisses were so attentive that she knew anytime he wanted to kiss her, she’d be willing to indulge him.  After a few seconds though, she pulled away from him, not wanting to get caught by anyone else in the office.  He didn’t seem to share the same thought, and instead moved to kiss his way along her jaw and to her neck, tugging her closer against him.  She tipped her head back a little, her eyes fluttering closed. He was getting a bit too amorous for the workplace, but she was having trouble stopping him.  She ran his fingers all the way through his hair.  

“We should probably stop,” she said, but her voice didn’t come out nearly as clear as she wanted it to.

“Mm,” he responded, but the fact that the noise made his voice vibrate through her made her eyes cross a little. 

“John, I mean it.”

Saying his name seemed to have a profound effect on her, and his eyes darkened considerably when he pulled back to look at her.  “I like the way you say my name,” He ran his hand up her back.

“I’ll say it again when you come over tonight.”  She hadn’t meant for it to come out so suggestive, but it really had.  She kissed him again and got up off his lap, heading out of the office.  “I should call Mr. Saxon if I plan on meeting with him again. I deleted his number, so I’m afraid I’ll have to get it from you.”

Mr. Smith grumbled a bit, but gave her his number without much complaint.  She offered him one more kiss before disappearing from the office. It almost made her nervous, how easy it was for her to offer him kisses.  

She dialled Mr. Saxon’s number as she walked to her car and was surprised that he picked up on the first ring.

“Hello?”  
“Mr. Saxon.  This is Rose Tyler.”

“Oh?  I thought you didn’t want to speak to me, though I’m not sure what I did wrong.”

“No, it’s nothing like that.  I wanted to see if you were free tonight, to talk about the kidnapping again.  I wanted to get some closure on the whole thing.”

“I thought we’d already done that.”

“Well, yeah, but- something isn’t sitting right. I think I’m remembering it wrong.”

He seemed to be hesitating.  “Why don’t we do this over the phone? I don’t have a lot of time right now.”

She frowned, a bit glad he couldn’t see her now.  “Alright…”

“What ‘isn’t sitting right with you’?”  

“I just- in my memories, the boy looks really different from you.  Were you blond back then?”  
“Yes, of course I was.”

“Oh.”

“It was dark in there, Rose, it might have just looked dark.”

“What did you say to me when you walked me home?” Rose demanded, suddenly feeling her skin crawl.  “Do you remember?”

Another long pause.  “Well, I… I suppose I asked you if you were alright, and-”

“And what did I say?”

“Blimey, Miss Tyler, what an interrogation?  I don’t remember.”

Cold washed over her.  She had her answer. “Alright, Mr. Saxon. I guess we didn’t need to meet up over dinner after all.  Thank you.” She hung up before he could say anything else, and sent Mr. Smith a text message. 

_ I’m headed home.  You can meet me there. _

He replied within a minute.   _ I’ll be there. _

By the time she arrived at her flat, she felt her heart rate escalate. She didn’t want to confront him, but she knew now that things were not the way she’d been led to believe they were.  And she wanted Mr. Smith…  _ John,  _ to be honest with her.  

She parked and get out of her car, not surprised to see him already parked across the street from her flat, leaning against his car.  

“That was fast,” he said simply.

“He didn’t want to meet, he asked to do it over the phone,” Rose explained. “But now I need to talk to you.”

“Oh?”  
“Come inside,” she said, letting herself into her flat.  She felt him follow her, felt his nervous energy start to build.  She tossed her keys and headed to her couch, sitting down on one end and looking expectantly at him.  He sat down next to her, a little farther then she would’ve liked. 

“Your brother wasn’t kidnapped,” She said softly, “It was you.  You were with me.”

All the color absolutely drained from his face.  “I-”

“You don’t need to bother to deny it.  Please don’t lie to me.”

The silence that fell over them was deafening, and John seemed to be struggling to form words.  “Yes. It was me.”

“Why does your family say it’s your brother then?”

He looked down at his hands.  “My parents always thought it was me who had more privilege, and he didn’t have a lot to think about or draw from for his work.  So they really wanted him to take the story. I didn’t think he’d try to take you too.”

Rose blinked. She hadn’t expected him to be so forthcoming.  “You… You tried to  _ give  _ him your trauma?”

“Against my will, yes.”

“And that’s why you have the scars on your ankles, and why you’re afraid of zip ties.”

“Yes.”

“I… I don’t… You saved me.  Did you know it was me, when you hired me?  Who I was to you?” She found herself demanding, a bit against her own will.  She wasn’t sure she wanted to know.

“When you applied for the position, I knew I had to keep you safe.  Hiring you was the best way to ensure your financial stability and comfort without being creepy.”

All this time.  Every time he made her become proficient in a language, or stand up to someone who was technically above even him… He’d been doing it to benefit her.  She’d thought he was selfish, but really he’d only been thinking about her this whole time. Then, his proposals to her had to be at least slightly genuine, out of fear of losing her, as a secretary and as something more.  She found herself biting back tears at the thought of it all, feeling sorry for him for having his family be so unfair to him, and how unfair  _ she  _ had thought of him.

“Oh… Oh, no, don’t cry,” he said, suddenly sounding panicked. “I’m sorry, I should’ve told you, I know, I don’t know why I didn’t-”

She shook her head. “I’m not upset. I’m sorry for you.”  
“Well, yes, that would be a first.”

“It’s not fair.  You never got to work through it, never got to move forward.”  

He reached out and cupped her cheek, forcing her watery gaze to his.  “Yes, I did.” He drew her into himself, and Rose wrapped herself around him, feeling the crashes of sympathy for him wash over her. 

“You should stay tonight.  Just to- I don’t want, not yet, but- I’d like you to stay.”  She mumbled it into him, and he laughed lightly.

“If you really want me to.”  
“I really do.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so in the drama, the character that Saxon represents is actually sort of brainwashed into thinking he was kidnapped, but i felt it was more saxon-y for him to try to steal john's trauma. Very on brand, I think. 
> 
> From this point on I"m taking liberties and not following the drama anymore because I don't think the tropes fit with Ten and Rose and it drags a little. Hope that's alright!


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